Gemmill

That's not the actual podcast tbf. I can't watch the YouTube thing cos it's those two trying to be funny for 10 minutes and it's unbearable. The proper podcast is actually alright.

Run slower, score more. I think you might be on to something.

The attitude is bizarre like. They seem to exist in this alternate reality where they're simultaneously not good enough to get out of the Championship AND good enough to finish mid table in the Premier League. And the complete absence of logic just doesn't even occur to them. It's like watching Interstellar whilst standing next to some Spanish bins.

9:52 - Eddie responding to Nike Air Morphy Richards on his comments about time wasting.

"if it improves the team". We're THIRD in the fucking PREMIER LEAGUE, you STUPID CUNT.

That finishing has to be coachable. You can see what Willock's doing wrong technically - the commentators spelled it out yesterday. Give him an hour a week with Shearer over the summer and he'll be bursting the net with these chances next season.

Renton on his way to pick up the Guardian and the pains au chocolate this morning.

The point about having subs that can change the game. The mad thing is that's mostly only really happened cos of the quality of coaching. Longstaff being borderline undroppable for instance which means Joelinton can't get a start. And who 18 months ago would have called Joelinton someone who could come on and make a difference. Similarly Murphy is now good enough to start which keeps new £40m signing Gordon as an option off the bench. It's ridiculous stuff from Howe and the coaching staff. Howe is the true Minister for Levelling Up.

Potter has "agreed a severance deal package unrelated to the five-year deal he signed when he replaced the sacked Thomas Tuchel." The fucking wet lettuce. He's taken the shine right off his sacking for me.

I can't remember who it was, but I remember one of the players being asked who the funniest player in the squad was and they said Murphy. Can't really argue with them given some of this shit he's pulled recently.

Who makes his shoes, fucking Morphy Richards? He's got a pair of steam irons on his feet, the fucking helmet. Also the less said about his baggy jodhpurs, the better.

Our odds pretty much reflecting what the bookies think.

Pissing into the toilet is mag behaviour.

Shearer not mincing his words about Southgate: Instead of picking players who either aren't playing, or aren't performing, he needs to get himself to SJP to see some of the English lads that are playing there.

Enjoyed Danny Murphy dismantling Ten Hag's tactics on MOTD2 while Shearer just sat there with a big grin on his face.

Aye I'm still using Firefox.

Howe talks all the time about how his great passion is improving players, so I'm sure he won't want to give up on ASM easily. I've thought he was away in the summer for a while now, but I'm beginning to doubt that.

Absolutely lovely stuff. What a day we're all having.

I bet captioning it "performing above our level" got overruled by some absolute spoilsport.

Ten Hag taking off both his centre halves = streetwise. Actually.

They'll be looking for another manager in 18 months.

Ten Hag trying to claim that De Gea wasnt time wasting in the first half and was "just waiting for an opportunity to play it out from the back". An absolute fraud.