Gemmill

I'm gonna audit this. There's a thread starter league table incoming. You've forced me into this, reputations are on the line.

He's just licked it clean. Doesn't miss a drop, loves his beans.

I tell you what, it's tough at the top. Having to endure this grief from the absolute dregs of the thread starting world.

Shit title but quite honestly I've got nothing bad to say about Pep, and when you're forced to do these every week, it happens.

Nailed it.

Not sure, it's just called Wonder and it's in the app store. It can't even cope with Pep wearing a t shirt saying "Eddie is my HERO" though. I will be cancelling my subscription before the trial expires FO SHO.

Any requests?

There's an app called wonder where you give it a prompt and the AI produces art of your prompt. I've tried to get it to do a pic of Eddie Howe kicking fuck out of Klopp, but the best it's done so far is this picture of Wayne Rooney eating baked beans.

We've been over this. For the VERY LAST TIME. You collapsed a section of the forum and then complained that you couldn't see it.

What a pair of dickheads. Do not touch the thread starting duties. You are not equipped to cope with this run of fixtures.

I hope he just had a mental season last year and can't make the step up. Nothing against the player, he is simply collateral damage in my personal war against that CUNT at Liverpool.

All his little worshippers just chuckling along as well, instead of someone saying "er mate, we've never seen Jason Tindall pull a hamstring trying to wind a fourth official up".

Never mind that, did you see the state of CT's shorts in Newquay last week?

That just conjures images of his insanely fit missus having to constantly get the toilet brush out.

He's a grade A cunt, that bloke. But the great thing about all this is it's just further evidence that he is properly rattled by our emergence as a threat. We're fully occupying his thoughts. Long may it continue. BTW Jurgen. If you're worried about us, get better at your job. On yesterday's evidence, your pre-season has been quite a bit less effective than Eddie Howe's, despite your enormous reputation/ego.

Something about him chinning a yeti would scan better, maybe?

Not that it matters, but in the Gary Neville podcast which this week featured Carragher too... Neville reckons having just watched Chelsea v Liverpool, Newcastle look to be in a better spot than either of those teams even though both have "spent an absolute shed load of money compared to Newcastle". Nice to hear the fact about spending acknowledged. Carragher reckons Liverpool, if they play like they did yesterday, will be lucky to come away from SJP with any points. Obviously none of this matters, but it's just nice to hear us getting some proper credit from the Crown Princes of Sky's TV offering.

Are they sticking with him? Fucking hell, I'm amazed at that.

sammynb's latest music recommendation.

Baallls. Chelsea's second just offside. I was looking forward to seeing a touchline performance from Conrad Poohs.

Not sure how much money I'd spend on a stadium when I can't trust the people that frequent it to get their poos in the toilet.

I'd like a draw or a Chelsea win please.

Get in Brentford. I've been assured this week that Spurs will be the most entertaining side in the league. So far, not for Spurs fans.