Gemmill

Silva will be calling that "a disgrace", winking at the camera after the game, knowing he's bulletproof.

Red coming. FLAWLESS VICTORY!

Fractured his skull innit.

Jimenez with the Mortal Kombat acrobatics. Prick.

Bruno's shooting is cack.

Straight down under no challenge, grabbing his hamstring.

Schar fucked.

No Trippier. SCHAR BLAMMERS!

Fulham are gonna park the big pink bus here.

A rare misstep from Hungry Jack's on Optus there. Barbecue Sauce on a burger? Don't mind if I don't, dickheads! Anyway, settle in for a regulation 3 points today. Daddy's home.

Two Rolls Royces return to service. One to the back 4, the other to match thread duties. Beautiful symmetry.

And a highly effective one, at that.

On one of the recent Rest Is Football episodes, Lineker and Richards were talking about different times they've met Dynamo. Anyway they were each describing tricks he'd done etc. Then Richards goes to Lineker "Do you believe in it though?" Lineker was like "well.... They'll be tricks."

In the bloke's ear for the full 500 mile round trip, telling him how disabled he is.

Their big anti Saudi protest has been cancelled too. Good and fucking proper.

No way Fauntleroy will be able to pull off the personal assistant look.

Not even match day and we've already taken the Black Cats Bar good and proper.

KLD is no longer the best thing since big tits.

From ham onwards you're having a NIGHTMARE here. A Ramsay's Kitchen NIGHTMARE.

Cake pops. Fucking vile cake on a stick.

Sly Bailey is CT's Christmas drink of choice.

I didn't want to say that it might lose you some weight off your sweaty tits, yet here I am having to say it.

I quite regularly have lasagne made with thinly cut layers of aubergine instead of pasta. It's great. It's a faff and absolutely not as nice as lasagne but I don't have to stand and cut the fuckers so I don't care.