Gemmill

To be clear, I'm speaking figuratively, that's not me stating what's currently happening.

Eddie stood on the touchline with his knob hanging out basically. He fancies a PAGGERING for this Burnley lot.

Looking forward to Binface on stage at the announcement.

She's a disgrace like. Lots of decent journalists left the BBC when it became clear which way they were leaning politically. Kuenssberg has actually leaned into it.

Thread. But the short story is Khan is absolutely destroying Hall.

I'm in the Lakes this weekend so no match coverage at all. I'm just gonna describe what I think is happening and come 90 minutes we'll know if I've got the second sight.

Harsh on Dave, but not a lot I can argue with.

Thread. Basically turnout is down in a load of the places Khan does well, and up in places he doesn't do well. I mean I don't really give a fuck who the mayor of London is, and this clown is gonna be a headache to the wider Tory party. Looks like Khan might have fucked it.

This is great news for Labour. You basically can't do this extrapolation that the BBC and Sky News are doing cos locals don't map to the national picture. But Starmer will be ecstatic that they're warning against complacency on his behalf.

Charm offensive latest. Morale soaring.

He looked so fucking needy with Houchen earlier. Houchen made a shit joke about Starmer and Reeves boosting the local tourism economy by visiting constantly. Well, Sunak laughed louder than any cunt there at this absolute zinger. A completely emasculating experience, having to travel all the way to Teesside to bask in the reflected glory of a bloke who couldn't have been more explicit in distancing himself from Sunak during the campaign. He's pathetic.

How did you find Craig's twitter account?

Starting to sound like London Mayor is on a knife edge and Khan might lose. Honestly if Hall wins, she's just another problem for the Tories cos she's fucking doolally.

I think it would be if there was some honesty in the media. To be fair though, there's been a lot less of the "Oooo but it's not great for Labour" as there was last year. I think the tide is turning a bit, and they all know the game's up. Sunak has hotfooted it to Tees Valley to attach himself to Houchen and celebrate a swing which will lose him every parliamentary seat in the mayoralty. He's doing a speech now, toasting his own funeral, the spineless prick. He's saying "the Labour Party knew they needed to win here to win a general election". Keep lying to yourself, you short pantsed cunt!

Labour win the new York and North Yorkshire Mayor. Sunak's constituency is located there. He won't even realise though, he's too focused on delivering for the people of the country.

Job done if he doesn't start there til after the summer window imo. They can have the little rat after that.

McGuinness wins NE mayor.

Focus, bitch. With your black logos and your tinted windows and your mid-life crisis.

It would be foolish of me to give you the benefit of the doubt given your personal history.

The fucking robot of a PM says the results are disappointing, but he's..... wait for it..... "focused completely on delivering for the people of the country". Meanwhile the country spent yesterday focused on letting him know how well they thought that was going.

Are you just looking at how much Houchen's vote share has come down by? Which is 19 point something? You take half of that and half of how much Labour's has gone up by. Add them together, and that's the swing.

It's 16.5.