Gemmill

Genius! Apart from the bit where he pissed all over the floor, obviously.

Good point. Which of you dirty puddle-makers doesn't wash your hands after a piss? You may as well own up now. Until you've hit rock bottom you can't start making improvements.

I had no idea I was so talented until you fucking cavemen came along to deliver your piss tales.

Aye, now you've got a dishwasher 114348[/snapback] Jonny, you cheeky bastard!

Can't see it happening without a stott on like, and surely you can anticipate that. 114351[/snapback] He's got one of those little button mushroom sticky straight out jobs man. He calls it his hernia.

It's a jungle up there. 113957[/snapback] Plenty of blacks? 114225[/snapback] 114321[/snapback] Missing one of these I'm sure.

Domestic God tbh.

Dressing gowns and belts can both cause problems, but I think I realised this before the age of, hmmmm, say 10, so I've taught myself not to piss on them as well, or divert the flow by hitting them. Seriously, some of you lot are fucking retarded. Besides, you don't get rancid floorboards from the odd dressing gown incident. That sounds to me like persistent offending on a monumental scale.

I can't believe how incredulous you all are at someone who says that they DON'T piss on the floor!

Nope half the time when I'm just taking a leak, especially if it's the middle of the night, it also helps if there's something along those lines that hadn't been anticipated. Agree about wiping if you happen to hit the seat, there'd be an interesting correlation between what people say in here and what they say in the showering thread, I reckon. 114317[/snapback] I dunno like. That sounds a bit effeminate to me. And if you don't sit down, do you just find yourself dropping logs on the floor behind you or something - how are you not anticipating shit? I agree about the showering thing though. Cleanliness is next to godliness.

Seriously though, how hard can it be? I can't believe you had a rancid floor board in your house. Were you brought up in a Roddy Doyle novel?

No, but you can make adjustments, I never have a problem with it, although I do sit half the time anyway... I do however have a problem with "splash-back" from urinals, so I won't use them. 114307[/snapback] Please tell me you only do your sitting when you need a shit. I don't have a problem with this. I don't piss on the floor and I don't piss on the seat. If for some reason I do piss on the seat (never the floor ), I wipe the fucker off with bog roll and flush it down the bog, so no one's any the wiser.

Don't know if anyone's ever been on the SMB Gold Forum, but this thread is worth a read. It goes on for ever, but it's a proper page-turner. : http://www.readytogo.net/smb/showthread.php?t=15852

You can always spot a part-time know-nowt-about-football professional Shearer hater when they blame him for the disallowed goal against Argentina IMO. Useless fucking wench.

i can see the headlines now.... More disgrace for Newcastle united as one of its forums is closed down pending the outcome of a case involving underage girl/phone sex/topless photos displayed on the internet all aided and abetted by 20 forum members on the net!!! 114189[/snapback] Hitzfeld will never come to manage us after that 114191[/snapback] Graham Rix might. ALLEGEDLY.

Consider it practise for if you get that conductor's job.

Remember that this thread may well provide the basis for SMO's defence in court, so don't say anything that you don't want to end up in the papers.

I'm not that arsed about seeing the photos, I'm only in it for the classic thread potential! ars. 114175[/snapback] I've obviously missed something on here today - or you're just calling me names. And yeah, yeah - whatever! 114178[/snapback] And rightly so. It's the new tbh - Renton's creation.

I'm not that arsed about seeing the photos, I'm only in it for the classic thread potential! ars.

Haway Ritchie - do it for the good of the board! We're at a turning point - this thread could be the best ever or a damp squib.

No matter how proud I am of my warrior, I don't want it on the fucking web!! 114160[/snapback] I just read that while I was on the phone to someone from work and got the giggles.

Joey's reading this thread now. He strikes me as the sort who'd be up for this sort of thing - that avatar was a blatant phone-pic. It must be fate that he signed up today tbh.

Who's sticking the photo on then? I can't cos I'm at work and don't have the facilities, but someone must be able to.