Gemmill

If they get a third, he's going down injured while Eddie sorts shit out.

Man United get a second. Our goal difference advantage is down to just 24.

Everton will be thrilled to be getting Neal "Goal Machine" Maupay back after this game.

Frank overcome with emotion there, chewing his chewing gum like an even bigger cunt than usual.

They should check this for a pixel of offside, just to be sure.

Stick it up your jumper, VAR. And you too, Ten Hag.

Get in.

Don't let fucking Schar take this.

Here we go. Fucking VAR man. They're chalking it off. Fuck this absolute nonsense.

Get in Lewis Hall. Great run and penalty.

We've got a goalkeeper back.

Man City ruining my Arteta dream. 3-1. Well done Pep, 4 on the bounce. Now leave.

We've landed right on our feet with Lewis Hall.

I think the Villa lads have been on the hoy since they got CL. They're getting pumped.

Ethan Pinnock, Professor of Physics. Get Viz onto that. Just expecting to duck under that and it would all be fine.

Bournemouth score now. Great stuff lads. Maybe let them go to 3-1 before you get your second.

Here lads, don't fuck this up from 3 nil.

Liverpool 3 up. Commentators cannot move for spunk.

2 nil Chelsea. Oh well.

Aye Chelsea definitely not running away with it or anything. At least not yet, but they can score goals in a hurry. I'm just pleased we've turned up. Chelsea fucking up would be an insane bonus at this stage.

I'm now canny desperate for Man City to drop points at home and Arsenal to fail to beat Everton. Arteta on the touchline would be pure box office.

Be class if Bournemouth could pull off some shenanigans in the second half. At least we've done our bit, and Man United can finish 8th and fucking well like it.

Toney must have money on himself getting carded with that bullshit.

My stream went down and I come back to find 3 nil. Arsenal losing.

The Spanish Steve and Alex Bruce.