Gemmill

Also, Sunak confirming that no flights will leave to Rwanda before the election. So hundreds of millions spent on a scheme that will never be put into practice. Canny.

Tobias Ellwood was on telly earlier and mentioned three possible outcomes from the election: Hung parliament Tories lose "well" Tories lose "badly" Real inspirational shit on day 1 of a campaign, and basically Vote Tory, get a Labour led coalition. What incentive is that to vote Tory. Some of them have just given up and can't even bring themselves to pretend anymore. Meanwhile Sunak is in excited chihuahua mode.

Has everyone watched Atlanta? It's ostensibly a half hour comedy show about a rapper and his management team in Atlanta. But as you go through the seasons they get more and more ambitious and it turns into social commentary, but always funny. I've just watched the episode where it's a mockumentary about, after the Rodney King riots, Disney appoints a black CEO who wants to make a goofy movie. He's convinced Goofy is a black bloke and he wants to tell the story of the black man in America through Goofy's eyes. Anyway strong recommend for the whole thing.

His index finger. Cheeky little stroke I reckon. Some er.... decent pics on her twitter tbf. But she's a Villa fan and a Farage fan, so she can do one.

Sunak on the North East today apparently. Probably tonguing Houchen's hole. Be interesting to see if they try to keep pulling the strong arm security stuff that they've done with the Sky presenter yesterday, to keep Sunak insulated.

Ugghhhh the vox pops now. Straight to some market worker in Bury to talk about immigration: "The country can't take any more people!" Just fast forward us to polling day ffs.

The BBC's Henry Zeffman this morning trying to claim that Sunak speaking in the rain was somehow a brave decision which reflected his underlying message of leading in difficult times. apparently his team will be quite happy with that. Also it's difficult to hear speeches even without music playing so that didn't really matter either. It's gonna be a LONG old 6 weeks.

Yes please. Let's get this plan into action.

Feels like the club are stepping up their negative campaign against Ashworth in advance of the arbitration.

Latest ratboy update from Hope.

He's become a meme on day 0 of the election campaign.

By the sound of it no one on the Tory side can believe he's done it. Lots of quotes from anonymous MPs, local party activists etc, and they just sound so deflated. Fucking love it.

Quarter Finals on the 5th though. Moving day for Rishi.

Teeny tiny man.

For anyone who missed it. This could be Sunak's bacon sandwich moment, and the campaign hasn't even started.

Just booked the 5th too. Hope Hunt stands and loses. Looking forward to Binface standing in Richmond too.

Absolute poetry that he's standing there getting fucking pissed on while he tries to big up this government's shambolic record.

Get in with it, soggy little dwarf. Name the date then fuck off back into your house and start packing.

His awkward laugh whenever anyone asks him a question he doesn't like too. That is gonna be getting a lot of air time.

The lectern is out. Bring out the gimp!