acrossthepond

Taking a pounding. None of this lot look like they are professional footballers, they're just waltzing around like it's all good, absolutely no urgency.

Martins to come on for Owen. Despite my distaste for Owen, I disagree with this change. Ameobi absolutely must come off. This big man-little man shite is going to lose us this game if Big Sam doesn't wise up soon. Taking off Owen so early in the half won't help.

I'm not denying Ameobi's been awful. It's just he clearly IS the scapegoat seeing as nobody else is getting any abuse at all. It's a bit confusing really. I think everyone but N'Zogbia/Rozy/Cacapa has been shite. Ameobi has been by far worst.

Absolutely horrific from what little I've seen, which pretty much began at Geremi's free kick. People running the ball over the touch line, Shola pounding around doing sweet bugger-all, awful awful awful.

Must be said, that piece of skill to set up Ameobi's shot was beautifully worked. Of course the wally muffed it. Why is he starting?

WHAT THE HELL? The commentators spent like 5 mins picking the bones of Geremi's corner and we cut back to the ball in the net. Great work ye sorry sods. Oh, and they scored. Amazing. Only NUFC could pull this off.

My paid stream site has the game scheduled but isn't showing it. Perfect. Anything to report?

Ameobi? I must be undigested corn, because you've got to be shitting me.

No thread up for it, figured I'd give it a go. The bonus: How many yellow cards will be awarded? My predictions: HT: 0-2 FT: 0-2 FS: Owen Bonus: 3.

RIP. Offshore, piss off mate. Nobody likes a child who thinks he's a man.

Your irrational hatred is quite unusual. Martins has already contributed more to this club than Michael Owen probably ever will. Martins should start, whether Owen does or not.

Thank Harper for services rendered, bring Given back into the first squad. Good move by Big Sam to keep Given on the sidelines for the Wigan match, not like Roeder who would have certainly rushed him in as soon as he could stand. But barring another injury during the internationals, Given will be ready to start by the Derby game and he must start. He is a world-class keeper. Harper is a world-class keeper's understudy. The choice is clear.

Looking to see England lose badly. I am an England supporter and it would be hard to see us lose, but I believe it's for the best. "Magnificent" Steve must go sooner rather than later and big losses here will have him sacked faster than that Torquay manager. I remember a similar debate around the Blackburn home game last year - can a true fan hope for Newcastle to lose? And I say now as I said then, yes, if it's for the good of the team.

So clueless. Easy to say now that Owen's goal won us the match. But whose cross was it? Martins's. tbh I also couldn't see Martins muffing those clear chances that Owen did. Owen doesn't play for this club. He makes cameo appearances. I have to put my trust in workhorse Martins.

Now if the Mackems just beat Man U it'll be absolutely perfect. Spurs giving up an 89th minute equali(s)er, Bolton losing and our lot winning at the last.

I'd like to say this is unbelievable. ...but really, it's just so believable it's sickening. ...WAIT A MIN, WE'VE DONE IT! Owen is still shit but we've finally scored!

Dear Big Sam: Thanks for putting Martins on. Next step: Take Owen off. Maybe next game you'll go the whole nine yards and take Owen off for Martins. Thank you.

Dear Big Sam: Hurry up and put Martins on. Thank you.

Halftime evaluation: Could've easily been 2-0 or 3-0, should at least be 1-0 (Owen's disallowed goal.) Wigan look feeble in the attack and even worse in defence. We'll take 2 in the second half, I think. OWEN has been subpar which is no surprise. It's time to see Martins come on for him. Milner and the Zog have been creating chances like mad, Viduka and Smith also working hard. Kirkland having a great game. Liverpool have gone 2-0 against Derby pretty much sealing the win, Fulham have pulled one back against Spurs making it 2-1, and Boro are beating Birmingham 2-0, the smoggie bastards.

It's because he is shite. Martins would've finished there. Not at all pleased with Owen getting picked over Martins.

Horrendous miss by Owen after an equally bad defensive error sent him 1v1. We always look like scoring, they won't keep us out much longer.

Unbelievable handball by Bramble in the box just now. Ref must've been looking the other way. Absolutely clear, no doubt penalty. That's twice we've been robbed now, let's hope this ref isn't playing for the other side.

Owen's goal ruled out for offside after he got on the end of Milner's deflected shot. He was certainly on, ref appears to have ruled it out for Viduka being off.

Impressions so far: Defenders look solid, Cacapa esp. Melchiot is a really ugly fellow and that "hairstyle" isn't helping. Good movement up the field, looks promising. In other news, West Ham are 1-0 up at Reading with a goal from Bellend. Yakubu has also scored for Everton and Spurs have a goal from Kaboul. 3 away teams 1-0 within 10 minutes. Let's hope Wigan don't follow suit.

Owen played onside for a 1v1 by...guess who?...Bramble. Hilarious.