Dazzler

Fuck off, you think I don't know Cruddas Park shopping centre when I see it?

This is Johannesburg Ange: "okihiy lads, thaht wihs a good pihřfořmance tonihyit. Udogihe whaht thihh bloody hall wihs thaht two footihd chollihnge abouht you fuckihng idihot? chřihstihan, you too you fuckihng stupihd twaht. Vihcařiho, whaht a fuckihng pihřfořmance cunht. Shame abouht thihh four goals though. I hope klopp, thihh bloody tuřkihy tiheth wankihr and ařtihta thihh cřyihng lihgo mihhn enjoy my prhrihssihr lads, i'm guhna buřy thihm. Fahkihn' faihr dihnkum cobbihrr."

"Okay lads, that was a good as gold perfawrmance tonight. Udogie wat the bloody root was that two footed challenge about ya fuckin' wally? Christian, you too ya fuckin' stupid wally. Vicahrio, wat a fuckin' perfawrmance cunt. Shame about the bloody fah goals though. I hope klopp, the bloody turkey teeth wankah 'n artetah the bloody sook lego bloke enjoy my pressah lads, i'm garn ta bury them. Fahkin' fair dinkum cobber."

So long as you continue not attending matches we are - Please tell us you are at least 1000 miles from Dortmund this evening otherwise I may as well wash my lucky toon top now (tbh I reckon my family could do with us losing tonight, the top could do with a wash).

OK I'll ask. Do you wipe your arse sitting down or standing up......you cunt?

I've only been here a short while but I can honestly say that this could be referring to anyone

Levy will sack him for that kind of straight talking, common sense craic if he's not careful.

Fat Sam would batter spurs with gravyball.

The bit after Terryology got a bit dark

His opening words in this snippet of an interview sums it up perfectly. What a man.

100% KO rate in bigg market straighteners too.

He's not even doing those kinds of numbers in the farmers league he currently plays in

New Hell House LLC film is a decent watch. The first one is probably my favourite found footage horror film ever, the second one was decent, the third was a parcel of shite but this new one is pretty good.

I am all for equality but I can't help but think both would play better if Willock wasn't inside him during the match.

Seems like a bit of a bellend who is loved by his manager and colleagues so probably not as bad a bloke as you're making out tbh. Yes, what he did was stupid and I think should have seen a red. Yes, it's not the first time it's happened. But it's not every game, and he's a phenomenal player - much better than Cabaye (IMO) who WAS a stroppy, petulant, dirty bastard on the pitch (and off). Also, ask yourself would that have happened at all had the ref not completely bottled the Havertz challenge? Which was as clear a red as I've seen in a while. He got a yellow because contact was minimal, but you don't go into a two footer, studs high challenge without fully intending on causing an injury. The ref completely bottled the first half, and had he had controlled the players more Bruno would never have done what he did, whether rightly or wrongly.

Aye, I forgot about that one. I think these conspiracy theories are mental especially from teams like Arsenal and Liverpool who statistically benefit more from 50/50 decisions than anyone because their managers cry arse on like petulant bairns. I reckon on balance we've benefited from as many decisions as we've had go against us, and that's probably true of most teams. But I would be willing to bet Arsenal, Man Utd and Liverpool are closer to 60/40 in their favour.

Shocking how often this happens tbf. I think he must show them his stumpy finger and scare them off.

shushed someone, went two footed, studs high into Longstaff and only got a yellow. What else did he do that game?