Kitman

Only if he doesnt get the move he wants

Good morning sir, have you arrived here from Victorian times?

Shearer = sheet metal worker's son Kinnear = shite mental wanker No? I'll get me coat....

Be interesting to see if he puts Owen on the bench for Chelsea

You are demoted and forced to accept a pay cut because you have no employment alternatives, your wife/gf/partner that you really love leaves you and your great neighbours move only to be replaced by the most annoying, tight arse cunts the world has seen. Or you just become danny b.

*Shudder*

It'd be worth it just to see Shearer's reaction. I picture him picking up Wise and throwing him against the wall, with Wise sticking there upside down, in the manner of a pub dwarf throwing competition

Terry Mac. Put the cones out , Terry

I can deal with despair, it's the hope I can't stand

You may not have heard that the club has appointed A Toon Insider as our official spokesman.

Surely not even he's that stupid enough to play that card twice? You couldn't rule it out on past evidence

Destiny calls. We cannot fail now

The Beeb is reporting it as breaking news, 'understands' appointment till the end of the season. I think this is fantastic (if *ahem* selected), it gives us a chance. I hope they make it a permanent appointment too, God knows who they'd get otherwise and would also mean little Dennis is on his way.

So basically none of what's happened to Tandy is his fault. Bollocks to that, I can't stand that bloody attitude. No doubt represented by an ambulance chasing lawyer too.

I couldn't see us spending 4m on another keeper. Hell, I can't see us spending 4m on another player. My guess would be his agent is trying to drum up a move to the prem, and has planted this story as a 'come and get me' ploy. He's probably feeling the sectarian heat, wants to get the hell out and fancies clamping his greedy snout on the EPL cash tit in the process.

Missing white dog shit on the pavements

Why start now after all these years? (at Bellamy)

JFK: " 'Ow much further is it, Derek? I'm sweating like a pig 'ere" DL: "Just another 8 flights to go, Joe. Let's run the next one." Another coffee Joe? "BOO YA FUCKER YA!!!!!! Ha, ha, just my little joke, Joe."

JFK: " 'Ow much further is it, Derek? I'm sweating like a pig 'ere" DL: "Just another 8 flights to go, Joe. Let's run the next one."

Owen and possibly Martins won't be with us next season. I'm convinced Butt will still be getting a run out when the last trumpet sounds.

I think it's scaremongering.

I've given up trying to understand their football decisions. Anything other than an engraved tankard and a whip-round for Kinnear at the end of the season makes no sense to me.

And footballers wonder why people think they're thick

Pikeys +

62 years old and a triple bypass. It beggars belief they're even giving him the chance to come back. It's not as if it's Sir Alex we're talking about here....it's a man with a record of underachievement. It beggars belief it really does, they're completely and utterly clueless and we're going down.