Kitman

I think we need to win against Fulham. I'm hoping Bolton will do us favour but they've nothing to play for.

Fly me to the moon, bay-beez. I've no time for the smoggies but Southgate seems a decent human being. Gibson's also been a fantastic chairman but he's going to lose a truck load more money if they're relegated, as seems very likely now. You have to wonder whether he can afford to bankroll the whole damn party, my impression is hardly anyone turns up for home matches as it is.

Amen to that. Whatever happens the attitude in the dressing room needs to change. If there are players with big egos bad attitudes and inadequate contributions we should do our best to move them on whether we stay up or go down imo. That description might cover most of the squad, mind. How in the name of all that is holy did it come to this? Graeme Souness. Willie McKay. Mike Ashley. Freddie Shepherd. I wasn't going to mention the chairman of the club in England that qualified for Europe more times than anyone else except four other clubs (or however it goes). No point in raising the dead.

Going down, bottoms up * Makes submarine diving noises *

Matt Johnson wasn't a cheery soul though, was he? You'd choose other people to have a pint with judging by Infected.

Satan? Don't you mean: *Drops voice three octaves and joins death metal band* SAY-TON? I think Old Nick's a Man Utd supporter actually It is said he moves from club to club in the night. You mean he's a glory hunting band wagon jumper?! I hope he's been seen in Barcelona then

UB40 and erm King. Although I assume it was a cover by UB40? I look forward to Ledley being treated with the same vitriol as Barton and Bowyer if charged and convicted.

Amen to that. Whatever happens the attitude in the dressing room needs to change. If there are players with big egos bad attitudes and inadequate contributions we should do our best to move them on whether we stay up or go down imo. That description might cover most of the squad, mind. How in the name of all that is holy did it come to this? Graeme Souness. Willie McKay. Mike Ashley.

Satan? Don't you mean: *Drops voice three octaves and joins death metal band* SAY-TON? I think Old Nick's a Man Utd supporter actually

I used to quite like them the band that is. Duran Duran. Talk Talk. The The. I thought he was referring to Them

Amen to that. Whatever happens the attitude in the dressing room needs to change. If there are players with big egos bad attitudes and inadequate contributions we should do our best to move them on whether we stay up or go down imo. That description might cover most of the squad, mind.

Satan?

Beat Boro and we have a chance we scarcely deserve. I've got nothing against Hull as such, it's just a case of them or us.

So do I. I hope he gets the time he needs if he does stay.

Absolutely. Otherwise we might need to get 36 points to stay up which looks beyond us at the moment. Winning our remaining home matches might just be enough.....which also looks beyond us on present form. Of course we're relying on Boro, Hull, Mackems to continue their rubbish form to the very end.....and sometimes one of the relegation teams will pull off an unexpected giant killing feat in the run in to survive, so we need luck. * makes note to put on lucky underpants, scarf, hat, hold lucky key ring, stand on one leg, draw only the left curtain, get Mrs K to wear batman mask, get every other house in the street to turn lights off, eat lucky cheese, write the name of Shearer on Italian marble (imported) and lay at the bottom of nearby lucky stream/river, slaughter sheep at 12 midnight on night before games, manifest the devil by putting ipod on loop while incanting the name of Madonna. * FYPTBSTBS Eat lucky cheese? I shall render my body completely hairless and dressed in black ceremonial robes I will sacrifice a chicken to Papa Legba by the light of the moon to prophesy our victory in its squirming entrails. Either that or wear my lucky underpants. Full moon this weekend, don't forget to dance around naked. It's a bacchanalian goats head soup lovefest every weekend at Kitman mansions [/Parky]

Darth Vader. Old skool manager.

Absolutely. Otherwise we might need to get 36 points to stay up which looks beyond us at the moment. Winning our remaining home matches might just be enough.....which also looks beyond us on present form. Of course we're relying on Boro, Hull, Mackems to continue their rubbish form to the very end.....and sometimes one of the relegation teams will pull off an unexpected giant killing feat in the run in to survive, so we need luck. * makes note to put on lucky underpants, scarf, hat, hold lucky key ring, stand on one leg, draw only the left curtain, get Mrs K to wear batman mask, get every other house in the street to turn lights off, eat lucky cheese, write the name of Shearer on Italian marble (imported) and lay at the bottom of nearby lucky stream/river, slaughter sheep at 12 midnight on night before games, manifest the devil by putting ipod on loop while incanting the name of Madonna. * FYPTBSTBS Eat lucky cheese? I shall render my body completely hairless and dressed in black ceremonial robes I will sacrifice a chicken to Papa Legba by the light of the moon to prophesy our victory in its squirming entrails. Either that or wear my lucky underpants.

I think Viduka and Owen's contracts are up at the end of the season. And you'll buy Barton, it's written in the stars . Oh yes Take your point though. I guess some players will assist in moving on as they'd be too good for the championship (in their heads). We may have to take losses on some deadbeats like Geremi and Duff just to get them off the wage bill. Some we will never ever shift and I look forward to Shola's stint as player manager in ten years time.

Absolutely. Otherwise we might need to get 36 points to stay up which looks beyond us at the moment. Winning our remaining home matches might just be enough.....which also looks beyond us on present form. Of course we're relying on Boro, Hull, Mackems to continue their rubbish form to the very end.....and sometimes one of the relegation teams will pull off an unexpected giant killing feat in the run in to survive, so we need luck. * makes note to put on lucky underpants *

Judge: "would the defendant care to point out the person in question regarding the race hate charge." Craig:"Of course. That mop-haired Argentinian/Pakistani/Polish/Black/* cunt. God I hate him!" Judge: "ah I see, thank you for being so specific, case dismissed." *add your own Hmmm - slight issue here, it's an internet forum, not a court of law. Get some fucking perspective you retard! Fuck * Takes wig and gown off *

Once again Barton thinks he's done nothing wrong. He never does, does he?

I just goes to show what a bunch of pampered childish egotistical nobs these players are. It just goes to show how rotten we are and how unprofessional are players have become. Anyone who bitches about these basic standards wants shooting. If we were top of the table I'd be more sympathetic. We need drastic surgery go down or no.

Can't say I agree. He's hardly turned out for us and he's never hit his Man City form when he has from what I can tell. In addition he's generated bad publicity through his own actions and shown little evidence that he's capable of change. This latest episode points to a lack of respect for the club and its predicament imo. Some players just never seem destined to do anything regardless of how they look on paper. In Barton's case it seems to be a mixture of bad luck with injuries and a radgee mentality. Whatever the reason he's not worth the aggravation, disruption and expense imo and we should get rid if we can as there'll be more to come from him I'm sure.

Not even sure what we need him on the pitch for. 2 goals in 2 years? Penalties at that. Half as many appearances as alleged perma-crock Owen? I base that solely on him not being Nolan or Butt.

Some people go on holiday to the same place year after year. Jings.