Ayatollah Hermione

I reckon Hull will end up around 15th/16th but no worse than that. For the drop next year though.

Either he's taking a massive pay-cut or we're breaking the bank to pay his wages. Isn't he on about 80K a week at West Ham?

Outside of squad depth, he's fucking useless. His assists have dryed up as well. I'd rather keep some of the younger players around the bench tbh. If we went and sold Barton from the centre of midfield, it'd be foolish but Geremi is hardly a miss.

Got him for nowt, flogged him for a profit. Canny business on a player that is so obviously finished.

Nigel fucking Quashie. Watch out Premiership etc.

As a free to add some depth, it's not too bad tbh. Better than James Beattie.

Elvis Costello - This Year's Model Perfect track after perfect track.

Amazing film which makes it even sweeter that I got it for £2 from Grainger Games in the town.

Also, if Parky is right and we do finish 7th, that has to be the best argument for drug use that will have come along in years.

The key to surviving the drop is to win and draw more games than we lose. Joe Kinnear would do well to take this advice into the dressing room. Imagine our relief when this simple philosophy results in continued success.

I reckon Harper will sign once he realises that first team football will be on the horizon. And I'd bet it's more likely that Harper hasn't been offered a contract rather than him stalling over one. If it's been confirmed that he has, then disregard that.

You owe me a new monitor.

Why Joe Hart? Harper is a perfectly fine mid-table Premiership keeper and Krul/Forster should be at the point where they can be relied on as dependable back-up.

Will that involve us kidnapping them and forcing them to play for us?

James Beattie...WATCH OUT RELEGATION BATTLERS, WE'RE COMING FOR YOU

I'd probably have Mido. Just for the surrealism of it all. And to see Louise Taylor go mental.

Aye, I'll be on through the afternoon probably. Don't get alarmed if I'm not talking, I'll probably just be in chat with someone.

Never going to get in to Villa's team either, bless him.

Faustino, she's not going to have sex with you. Stop

£32 million is pretty mental money for someone that's, largely, been a bit player this season. Undoubted class but if he signs, I can only see it being for a lot less.

I think it's all well and good having that steady supply of youth players that can be grown into good Prem players as a means of staying afloat but that all goes down the shitpan if we go down this season as the hit in losing Premier League money and having to replace our best players will do us worse than a scrappy Premier League finish ever will. I'm not saying we should be throwing silly money around this window to survive but I think we need to be spending, especially on depth in order to ensure that the supposed "plan" for the future can be implemented. I think I said before that next season would be the pivotal one for the club's future but this season has really got a make or break vibe to it. If we go down, we're down for a long time and possibly done ala Leeds but if we stay up, there's every chance of rebuilding. Then again, how many times have we said that before mismanagement fucked it all up?

Besty, I'll give you a game tonight. Was playing in a cup throughout all of this morning/afternoon. No worries though considering I won

I don't mean to brag but it'll tickle your ribs.

I remember people saying the same when he went to Blackburn.

£3 million would be a canny deal but 6 is taking the piss a bit.