Ayatollah Hermione

A gem from that other thread from Stevie "You have such sensationally shite patter. One of my teachers was from your town, he was a dickhead as well."

He'd have to be since we have nobody else similar to him at all. He'd probably get a decent run as well since there's no way Jonas will get replaced when he fucks off.

A bit more trivial than other suggestions but for people that can't attend the roadshows, would you be able to post a live audio stream on the website? And make it available to download after the fact? I think that's a good way for those who, either had prior engagements or live outside of Newcastle to get a taste of the debate and issues that arise. If this already happens then, disregard.

Would rather not sell him. Paper thin options up front and yesterday he showed enough to give you the sense he could be useful in the coming season. Put himself about well, is good in the air but needs someone alongside him that can read his flicks and play off him.

Whilst our worst were the two clowns from Argentina. Collocini takes the highlights (as does any dodgy NUFC centreback) but my patience ran out with Guiterrez a while back, he started brightly but is now known by me as 'blind alley' Jonas. He runs into defenders and tries to do the impossible and is also starting to embarrass us with his diving which is becoming frequent, his passing is very, very poor and his reluctance to take a man on when in a good postion and have a shot has me pulling my hair out, he has a phobia about shooting, if I was a team mate he'd get the hair dryer treatment from me, never mind the manager, (if we had one). How he never came off was baffling, our goal came about when Shola ignored the overlapping Jonas which would have been a decent pass to be fair, but he would have wasted it, instead he passed to Nolan who played in to Duff who took it very well, more of that kind of play please, lads. Jonas is seriously disrupting any flowing play we might produce, he's a liability. Spot on that like - It was a toss up between him and Ryan Taylor as to who wasted the ball the most - I would give Lua Lua a go in the right wing and put duff onto the left and get a right back asap. I would even give Geremi a go, I know he can't run but his positioning is so much better than Taylors I don't think he would get exposed as often. Also, the lack of pace might not be as big a problem for him as it was in the PL.

Will gladly take a draw from this game.

I hate being half right.

They're going to win from a handball decision, aren't they?

Oh shut up, you clueless cunt. "What they've been doing for years"

Hope Shearer volleys his bollocks out of his ears tbh.

Krul, calm and collected.

sitter

We could do with a sub.

I wonder if Mark Lawrenson's skin will turn to hives if he compliments anything about Newcastle.

Krul is two for two on quality first team performances

GET IN!

Tell you what, we cannot persist with Shola. We've seen nowt to suggest he'll be any good down this level. Carroll has put himself about well but he's been his usual lethargic self.

Krul on. Harper off with concussion.

what the shitting fuckfarts are these two doing on?

Coloccini, man. You get the fucking round, bastard leather thing not the fleshy, human thing.

Got a whole season of this, lads.

Not being able to defend set pieces is a part of what relegated us last year. Glad to see it's remained.

I'm not even kidding. Has Nolan been on the ball? Like a fucking ghost; what a carthorse.

Way to not prove me wrong, Ryan.

Why has the talking point of Ryan Taylor being a free-kick specialist endured?