Ayatollah Hermione

Those cats did very well for themselves by all accounts.

He could get his trombone and be the musical accompaniment on the away buses, I suppose.

The last thing our midfield needs is more midfielders with no legs.

So it is. I'll blame the drink.

The most depressing thing I've read in years. We won't cough up £2 million for Beckford and now, we're refusing (I assumed) to budge past £500,000 for Danny Simpson. The penny pinching is almost into self-parody.

As soon as you replied, the problem managed to sort itself out so I hold you personally responsible for fixing it. You're a scholar and a saint, good sir

Butter Face is the term you're looking for. Or BOBFOC, as they are on government records.

I can see why you stick to stating the obvious most of the time.

For some reason, over the past couple of days the texts I've been sending someone haven't been received on their end. I'm on O2, they're on T-Mobile and everyone else I text can receive what I'm sending. I receive their texts with no bother. Google is bringing up mixed answers and none seem to apply. Does anyone know if its on their end or something I can fix?

The best way to donkey punch? Uppercut or right cross?

Who's the unfortunate chap in the middle?

Can't say I can complain too much about this, as long as he's not our first choice next year. He's certainly a better option than Ryan Taylor at RB.

I'm usually a bit corned beef for a while after I wake up on a morning; I'm guessing that means I need syringed?

"Deluded Geordies Rub Off On Unassuming Spaniard" So to speak

I'm amazed you're still here when I'm the only one that's paid you any attention.

indeed.

Wykikitoon, what do you think of Jermaine Beckford?

I'm surprised he can still get up to do those overhead kicks.

Well, I want Penelope Cruz to come round and give me blowjobs and steak but it's just not realistic, Chris.

Being a dirty student, I love it. It means I can be zany and start building snowmen.

"A close pal" This is supposed to be a newspaper! "Pal" ffs.

Aye. That or "Why have you thrown me down a pit, you fucking arsehole?'

Be warned; playing this with 4 players is a sure-fire way to lose friends.

Not nearly rusty enough for my liking

Well, that sounded fucking exhilarating.