Ayatollah Hermione

and then me and my bestest friend went to the park and we played football and Sammy Brown fell in the lake and when he came up he was wet and we got chased by the parky but we were too fast for him and then I had beans for tea and my mam let me stay up to watch the football. The whole site is hilarious, one of them makes up a story about some toon fan(s) they know doing or saying something stupid/arrogant and the rest of them go into a wanking frenzy about how stupid/deluded we are. Its always entertaining and its nice to know that whatever their club does, we matter more to them and they just can't stop thinking about us, talking about us and writing bollocks on message boards about us. "a mag at work" = guaranteed stamp of shite.

"Tim Hat" is probably a typo but fucking hell

And the Pulitzer goes to Rohan Ricketts.

Rename the thread to "Poontastic"

At least the refs on FIFA never get piss easy offside decisions wrong.

Can't wait. I've never laughed as hard in the cinema as I did with number 2.

Aye, I've been told off a few people that it's when you're thinking things over in your head and it's a vicious cycle to get out of until everything sorts itself out. Still a right bastard though. Have you ever thought of being a therapist btw?

Shaka's doing punditry over there as well, isn't he?

Going through this atm. Fucking sick. Drink knocked me out last night but I was up at 7 but it's better than nowt. The sales of Relentless are through the roof at the corner shop because of me. Has anyone ever had that on an empty stomach btw? It's like a bad trip, was sitting on the metro thinking I was going to have a seizure since I could feel me whole body going mental.

Does Bernard still have that crepe shop? or own it or whatever it is. Does he still smell?

Bless him though. He obviously knows that he's out of his depth and not ready for this level. I mean, I know when I've been shite playing five-a-side, never mind in the Premier League. Like Stevie says, there's nothing in him where you think he could one day develop into a decent RB. When Carroll first came through, you at least seen that he had all the attributes to be a good striker whereas Perch doesn't have that about him. Mental signing really.

Gazza, man Shouldn't really be shocked anymore but it's still a depressing state he's in.

The statement about promoting from within has me thinking it'll be Pedro or Steve Stone.

If they want to save 16%, the BBC should not broadcast anything between 1am and 5am.

Official reason is it saves a massive 16% but it leaves the BBC to do the dirty work of cutting.

fucking hell

So he's Jay from the Inbetweeners? See in the other thread you insuated you're a footballer. I've got this thing I do to people I am close to. If I speak to them on the phone, I tell them what they're looking at, or ask them to think of a colour and I get it nine times out of ten. When you post I always see Peter Ramage's face. Not even close but cheers anyway

So he's Jay from the Inbetweeners?

Why do you throb at the gash over me so much? The presence of a total cock.

No need for thumbing in, he probably didn't even touch the sides.

Kevin could send us a picture of a bang tidy lass and we'd never know though. We need more concrete evidence.

I recommend it as well. It might be a bit too accessible for Parky though.

Kevin deleting the OP, I see. She must have been a right ten pinter.

The B. stands for "Benoit B. Mandelbrot".

Wouldn't mind backing a nail into James Corden's fat fucking earhole.