Ayatollah Hermione

With regards to the bust-up, it's a knocking bet that they've went to Carroll, "We're getting £35 million, now get yourself along there" without even bothering to ask what the player thinks. I bet he's getting about £70k as well.

Corrected. What do you think I meant, wooden head?

Precedent for the future if he goes

Hope he tells them to fuck off regardless

Fucking hell, man. Eyes bigger than his IQ has Ashley

"Stick to dogging in car parks and beating women up for the audacity of speaking to jocks you boring arrogant brummie bastard" I'm like Stevie's official liason fron Twitter to here.

He can have any haircut he wants now for my money.

Good summary and hard to argue with.

This. I reckon £30m + a player or £35m and he's gone. It's mental when you think about it.

Besty taking no prisoners on Deadline Day like. We have a big lugged Geordie Jack Bauer in our mix.

Still reckon we could have found a decent left-back to cover for Enrique. Having said that, I couldn't give you a name.

I reckon Ashley and Llambias are looking at this like another gamble. String everyone along until about 11pm to see how high people will raise. I can imagine them sitting together now telling Liverpool to fuck off, hoping for an extra £5 million and so on, telling Pardew any old bollocks.

Oh fuck, my arse is going here like.

Could definitely go for one of these.

Hard times for Diddy ahead. What's he going to do in defense? Throw a party?

Antoine Sibierski was a good one.

Where's this one escaped from? The fact you have to come on here to defend yourself indicates there's an itch in your mind suggesting that you might not be better and oh no what if the scum is right and oh look kevin nolan's scored again.

Aww, diddums.

And now it's time for Alan's Robbie's funny story.

Typical Sunderland. Signing moody French wingers 10 years after we did.

I literally couldn't give two shits about Sunderland. Well done, you've spent the money you got selling your best striker. Congrats.

If Sulley Muntari is so world class, why isn't he still playing for Inter?

What a thundercunt. Would be a tad more believeable if you said you had a gallon of moonshine, Kevin.

Ripe for a Stokoeshop?

I wouldn't be standing for that like. Alpha male her back into line.