Ayatollah Hermione

CT, do you refer to Toontastic all the time in your house like it's a mate who keeps playing jokes on you at work?

That blonde is terrific btw

Harsh but fair. Like the Russian police

Nowt to report hopefully

Marveaux to come back too. Abeid, Vuckic and Sammy showing youthful promise, Guthrie as dependable cover. Sound.

Nah, the parody one is canny good though, if only for his tweet after the Spurs game which was something like DID YE SEE IT? I WAS LIKE "PYEOW" AND FRIEDEL WAS LIKE "WHEW, YE MAD CUNT" AND I WAS LIKE "WAHEYYYY"

£10 million shelled out because this is a push for Europe and the recoupment of that outlay. Fucking chuffed either way. People that have seen him play reckon it's possible a 4-3-3 would suit, with Ba and HBA playing slightly wider with Cisse through the middle. Don't want to jinx us like but our fully fit attacking options are fucking mint.

Late push to sew up Europe spot? Perch to tek on some Greek chancers next season by himself?

The two Demba's up top taking the Papiss out of the opposition, raising the Ba and making the defenders look like Cisse's. Top that.

Wake me up when the Demba's end.

Pardew's silver tongue getting them to stump more cash up. What a bloke.

#letsgetcarriedaway

Sky Sports confirming it. Douglas calling it "massive statement of intent"

Quite injury prone but will fit in well with Geordie dialect. Bang, and the Dorst is gone

I'm a child

Perch broke up their play a few times. Canny sub appearance

We were the better side despite not even getting out first gear. They're shocking, no matter Wilkins' insane bias

Get Hatem down the right, Shola and Besty to run them ragged up top, Cabaye to win a tight game, howay

Think I'm going to sit in front of the XBOX

In one. But, it's the name of an album by The Weeknd that I'm well into atm and I quite like the designs around the cover.

Twin Peaks is on there actually so I think I'm going to go through him, see if it's as mental as made out. Doesn't Bowie show up for a minute?

You don't get 2nd top without being a good side like. Spurs are a good team and I think our draw (and subsequent performance in the game) against them was the first real time this season we looked a top 7 side. Big result for our season that IMO.

Whenever I'm positive, we get beat so I'm staying pessimisstic.

The best bit was when Billy Mitchell's gives that old wife the dodgy tape and he's like "you can die before you get there but don't lose the tape" and she's nodding along Apparently, he's a lot more devious and sinister than they made out, they were tied by phone laws (or something in place that means they couldn't broadcast the majority of the phone calls) so they tried to make it as obvious as possible what a twat he was. I do like how his best pal came round to wanting Wiebe to win though. That Walter Day's rock tunes btw Aye the bit where his mate's sat next to him saying "Not only has Wiebe proven himself as a great Donkey Kong player, he's just a great guy and I've met his wife and blah blah, and you just can't question his integrity." They turn to Mitchell and he just barks "Idon'tknowenoughaboutthesituation" Why was Wiebe teaching science and not music btw? Seems like he could play a load of instruments and they've got him teaching something wholly unrelated. It also begs the question why he didn't go and join a load of bands instead of sitting about playing Donkey Kong all day and ignoring his kids. Aside from that, seems a canny bloke.

I've watched more than 4 things in one night with Netflix, ha. Like Gemmill says, it's mint for just going through the selection and going "ah, been meaning to watch that" and before you know it, you're sitting up at 4 in the morning watching The Borgias and Louis CK dvds.