Ayatollah Hermione

You’re off your fucking head if you think this lot will ever go further left. I’m sorry, like. Starmer is a proven shyster who backtracks on everything he says. If there was an election tomorrow, I’d wipe my arse with the paper

Remember when they were definitely signing Harry Kane every year for £200 million until he went to Germany instead

Once Trippier, Wilson, Kelly, Targett et al are off the books, that frees up a wedge for Isak. He’s staying, lads

Imagine having the majority that this lot have and gleefully using it to actively ruin the lives of the worse off in the country. If we thought that the Tories had committed political suicide, I’d hate to know what this is. The kind of shit that drags people to either side of the politics divide and I’d absolutely bet my life on it that more people head further right

I’ve been laughing a bit about the rumours linking him away again. I think it’s high time that these lads in the press and the media realise that the tide is very much shifting away from “United” and their ilk who think they have unlimited pulling power from the rest of the plebs in the league. Isak is at a club which, to be perfectly honest, has done more to reach their ambitions in the last 2 seasons than the “big six” have done in 5-10 years. You can probably exclude Liverpool since they’ve been successful but that team is also at the end of its run and now the manager has a massive rebuilding job on his hands. Isak plays for a club that is positioned to bring in players around him in the summer, has a manager that absolutely gets the best of out him, plays to everyone’s strengths and he’s just lifted a pot. Come May, he could be back playing Champions League football next season. Unless he wants to drastically increase his pay packet, he’s going nowhere IMO. And having said that, I reckon we could probably stretch to give him an obscene wage as well tbh.

I shouldn’t laugh because that kid will never sleep again but what are the odds

Genuinely quite impressive how much his kite ballooned over his managerial career. Salad dodging cunt

Was mates with Bob Dylan and George Harrison. Damn the Torpedoes is good but aye, it’s all a bit samey

There’s got to be a bus parade, man. I’m planning on being dangled out a window upstairs in the Percy for it

Nice to have it confirmed that Graeme Jones basically kept us up when he came in the door. There’s another one who has massively earned this current success. Was basically managing the side for that fat cunt

Hope he doesn’t start taking after the gambling addict we’ve got in the middle

The Chinese have hacked Gemmill’s account. Too much buying shite off Temu

Free tickets but 10 quid a hot dog and 3 quid for a can of pop. Plenty coin to take in there that you wouldn’t get off a bus parade. And that’s the reality sadly

Aye, we got one last season

what a boring cunt His poor wife

May as well imagine us getting relegated twice in a row and spending the better part of a decade outside the top flight if they’re imagining things that would never happen to a proper football team

Think I’ll buy one of them tbh. Up there with Brighton making 16/17 Championship Winners scarves

Aye, if you work for a company that would sack someone on a Friday and ruin their weekend then they deserve the same in turn. If they’re mega cunts, tell them you’re not working your notice either

Wonder how this big party on the Moor is going to pan out. More people gathered for that than there were for Martin Luther King

Interesting to see that all the local journos are running with the same story about the summer. As in, Howe is going to be backed after a year of keeping the powder dry. Usually they’re exercising caution so I’m expecting a busy one

Being in town was class last night, like. I was at that Utilita Arena fanzone (less said about the pint queues the better) and walking up after the game, everyone chanting and beeping horns, it felt fucking brilliant. Then, into The Strawberry for a big party. What dreams are made of

My mate started crying when Isak scored

Fuck Sunderland. They’re fucking shite and nobody should ever listen to whatever their shit-munching idiot fans have to say

What a day. What a team. Haven’t stopped crying since last night. Off today, I’m going for a mender and celebrating in style. We’ve just witnessed a team and a manager make themselves legends