catmag

I'm not offended at all because I know that cracking a bit of a smile at a contraversial joke doesn't make me the worst person in the world! Anyway, I'm off to save some lives. I'll try to resist making sick jokes about my patients while I'm there

My dark humour isn't confined to my work :duuno: If you find all un-PC jokes offensive, then don't read the threads and don't judge others for having made them or responded to them - people are free to react how they do to things and they all have a concept where it would be inappropriate to do so. It doesn't make them the scum of the earth. Have you no friends that have ever cracked a sick joke down the pub? Are you still friends with them or did you think "that's disgusting, I don't want to be around someone like you "

Guess what, AF? You're not the only one to have friends in London, believe it or not. A friend of mine got off one of the tubes that blew up. She got off at Kings Cross and it blew up 4 minutes later. My uncle who was a pilot for United airlines at the time of 9/11 was sat on the tarmac of JFK airport waiting to take off when one of the planes ahead of him took off and flew into the Twin Towers where his daughter worked (she was at home with a sick child that day) We could go round in circles with this, and no doubt you'll drag it up again in the future, but it won't make any difference. I think this pretty much sums it up..

You called? AF - I'm not going to get into a slanging match with you cos frankly I can't be arsed. You've proved yourself to be a canny enough poster when you want to be but seem to have chosen that thread as your mission to drag up whenever you feel like it. Have you ever heard of black humour? The kind of stuff that people have used for years because in some small way it takes them away from having to think about the almost unfathomable awfulness of something that has happened, or to make sense of it. Do you really think that because I made a contribution to that thread (and didn't actually post anything that conveyed I was sat rolling around with laughter about it) that I've devoid of feelings, compassion or empathy? You've told us in recent weeks about your job and how you work from home and make music etc. Well over the last 4 nights while I've been working I've sat with the parents of a man while he died slowly after practically bleeding to death. I've cared for a woman who came to have surgery thinking she had appendicitis only to discover she had cancer on her pancreas, and looked after several people who have been anxious, upset, scared and in pain. So let's have a think about this again, shall we? Is that the kind of thing you could do if you had no feelings or appreciation for the evil in the world these days and just switched off and saw all terrible things as an excuse for hilarity. Guess what? I'm able to separate these things and I'm also at liberty to post what I like on this board. If you truly believe that I'm not entitled to post a sympathetic response to a tragedy because I previously contributed to something that you felt was unnecessary then that's fine, because in that big wide world where I work with tragedy and pain every single day, I can still sleep at night.

You know man. The spidery, searchbotty, Clive-esque thing that wanders around. Only it wasn't Clive, it must have been his brother or something.

Oh and I think 'Jeeves' is just a bit too fucking obvious before some clever shite suggests it!

So picture the scene... You're sitting there watching telly and it's one of them programmes with background music over some slow-motion screen shots (might have been X-Factor actually) and you think to yourself "Oooo, that's a really nice song, I wonder who sings it? I shall have to try and Google for it later on and then maybe purchase it for my listening pleasure!" Some time later you're pottering around with a charity variety performance thing on telly in the background, and whaddaya know, you hear the song again!! You turn round all excited only to for the song to end and hear the host saying "Ladies and gentlemen, let me hear your appreciation for the fantastic new song from.........WESTLIFE!!!!!!" Dilemma being, do you top yourself now or later, and do you ever admit it to anyone, not to mention buy it anyway?! This is all purely hypothetical, of course.

What shall we call this one?!

Player of the yeas?

Jimbo, is it you that makes Alphabites?

Sunderland struggling for 30,000 supporters today according to the radio... EDIT.. Commentator "Well, it is on the telly so a few people will have stayed at home for this one..."

I thought exactly the same thing when I just read that article. I thought it was much more recent than that.

Fffffffffffffffffffffff.........................luffy kittens!!!! (Courtesy of Marty from Shameless )

They won 3-2 in the end.

Just hearing this on the news now. Three bombs gone off in tourist resorts on the island - apparently 19 dead so far... http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/asia-pacific/4300274.stm

Or on the positive side, we've avoided a potential defeat Yes, we should be winning these games but with Owen out it was always going to be tough. Just his presence seems to give the rest of the team confidence.

How does this sound? Asprilla's Foreskin what's the score You really are a fucking bore Your patter's shit You're such a Pric You're starting to get on my fucking wick I'll keep it short, straight and blunt Piss off now you boring Cunt Now if you thought the above was nasty Console yourself with another pasty Any positive feedback would be appreciated. 41692[/snapback] Now tell him what you really think

You've got nee chance - I'm flying high!

My auntie was having a new kitchen fitted a while ago and while they were pulling out the new one they found the budgie they'd assumed had flown out of the back door 10 years earlier.

So Parker and Bramle were "hit by (unspecific) injuries" and Souness has put a couple of the kids in the squad "in case there's any reaction" after the training where they picked up these injuries? So are they injured or not, Alan? Will they be playing or not? What are the injuries they sustained? Or do you not actually have a clue but fancied waffling about Dyer and England instead?

Work, work, work, work, and increasing grumpiness as the nights go on......

She'll need a few x-rays once she's done... 41100[/snapback] Funnily enough - I was thinking something similar. Every time she hits something I wince and think "Oooooo her arm isn't meant to bend that way! Oh she's going to snap her neck.......Ohhh..... !!!" Where's that smiley that covers it's eyes cos it can't look?

That's really quite disturbing.

Surgery Obsession: Meet the Real-Life 'Ken' Doll August 18, 2005 STEVE ERHARDT is a man in search of perfection. A virtual human "Ken" doll, the celebrity hairstylist and makeup artist has undergone approximately 30 cosmetic surgeries and subsequent maintenance and has spent close to $250,000 out of his own pocket to achieve his current look. ET followed along with Steve to watch him get Botox and hear his unique take on the ideal appearance. "When you're in Hollywood, you have to keep yourself together and looking good to extend your career," he tells ET. "My photo gallery in my salon is like a chameleon. It's pretty amazing how I've changed over the years." What started in 1987 as a nose job soon became an obsession. Steve went to the same doctor that worked on MICHAEL JACKSON, and intending only to get rhinoplasty, he also ended up getting a cleft chin. From there, Steve went on to get a facelift and lid work and has since added such things as pec implants, bicep implants (he was the first person to ever have that type of work done) and even painful butt implants, one of the most difficult surgeries to perform for both doctor and patient. "I'm content with myself now because I've done everything that bothered me," says Steve, who says he looked like a cross between PATRICK SWAYZE and DAVID HASSELHOFF before he underwent his various surgeries. "There's no one I'm trying to look like. You have to work with the features you've got." So, what's Steve's ultimate objective? "I think the goal is just to stay youthful and feeling good," he says. "It's not really to look like anything in particular. Keeping your face nice, you know?" "Keeping your face nice?!" Will you tell him, or should I?

Yep, the fetish for Old Birds continues.....