catmag

Don't get me wrong, once I got to Uni there were various things doing the rounds but don't remember anything being available/offered in school or 6th form.

I've clearly led a very sheltered life

I've never been a fan of Doctor Who but the bairn stumbled across an episode this week and now we have a series link for all of the old episodes and in anticipation of the new series starting on Saturday. Along with his Star Wars obsession, I have proof - were it ever needed, that I'm raising a geek.

Usually is for me too which is why this is so strange. Feel like the breakfast news should be on the telly.

Jealous tbh.

I'm off work this week and this was my first child-free morning. Woke up at 7am, got cross with myself I'd intended to have a lie-in, thought I'd have another hour and woke up at 1pm. Now completely disorientated

You bought him off Gumtree? Why not get a rescue kitten? And this isn't me being all worthy but there's so many animals that could go to a good home from the shelters and charities.

Brilliant, thank you. It's a couple of weeks til I have to do it but I'll be sure to share. Any suggestions for edible components welcome. Would Cherry Lips be too racist??

That's it! Thank you Chezney

"And lahk, ma eyes wuh glazed urver, and auntie Jane said "Look, yuh eyes ah glazed urvah" and it wuh the nahhht we was watchin Stickeh Vickeh..." "That Stephen Fry - has he got a wife?"

Oh you're a sick man

Howay man, you saw how the Cookie Monster cakes turned out

I've been given my cake challenge. I can choose between Lionel Richie and Bruce Forsyth. Got to be Richie

I think we read that when I was about 11

They've got a pair of sisters from Leeds on this new series who are just thick as mince and very annoying.

I did English Lit A-Level and that year the theme was 'Tragedies' Fucking hell, it was depressing. Oedipus Rex, Dr Faustus, Antony & Cleopatra, The Power and the Glory and the poems of Gerard Manly Hopkins, a manic depressive priest who eventually dies of typhoid. It was cheery stuff. For some reason A Midsummer Nights Dream was in there somewhere and was a little ray of sunshine. I love it to this day.

Brilliant Did he not shout out of the window??

You're such a celebrity whore, Martin..

Just because I used it doesn't mean it's acceptable

That bad shoulder of yours seems to be giving you short-term memory loss. Maybe you should see someone about that

Aww man

Apologies for hijacking the thread and making it all about arseholes. Oh no, wait.....

Vibrators, potatoes, carrots, paperweights, pepperpots, deodorant cans, deodorant can lids (they didn't think it through and put it in lid first) shavers, and a mini tub of Brylcreem. None of them appeared to appreciate that if the door closes and the item disappears round the bend, you ain't seeing it again until we've used surgical instruments to dilate and retrieve.

Everyone has their own experiences of the NHS but to make statements like "But these NHS cunts are shit" is just laughable. You go on to say that a couple of days later you were back at work in agony - I take it that it's the fault of the NHS that you went back to work already being unwell? You're buying god-knows-what off the internet, self-medicating with it, "waking up 3 days later, bag empty, a black eye..." and you're calling us cunts?! Well, we cunts will be the ones resuscitating you when something you take potentially causes cardiac arrest. Something I've done twice recently to stupid, stupid people who think they're big, clever, cocky and invincible. Fucking go for it, sunshine.

I've a long list of items that people have had surgically removed. Which we then have to return to them as they're classed as 'patient property'