Alex

Always worth posting this again tbh:

I was absolutely shit at badminton.

....you're not really a fan so don't give a fuck?

Aye, 100% spot on as usual.

Best fake tan though.

That youtube clip of the goal in slow motion really was a thing of beauty. His balance and control of the ball is absolutely incredible.

She wants to sack her PR team if Danny SImpson's the best they could come up with.

There's always room for more money and it's not like he's going to be able to get a proper job.

Tbh, that's bigger than I've seen her, i.e. the first two series of Mad Men but I'm sure like most of us her weight goes up and down a bit. Either way, she's fucking lush and, in my view, what most blokes want, rather than your ironing board with two tennis balls shoved under the cover, like most lasses on telly.

He's hoping it'll be a turkey by Xmas.

What's the average size of lasses in the UK like? Without googling I'm guessing it's size 16 or above.

A budgie is a parrot Anyway, don't get one, CT. They should be flying about in the wild not stuck in a poxy cage.

The occasional cigar is a different ball game but how people afford to smoke tabs is beyond me. Still, as smoking goes down obesity and teenage drinking etc. are on the increase. The UK seems to have a collective addictive personality.

Posh charv

Not with an accent like yours I haven't.

Renton, if you're in the vicinity, and feeling even snobbier than normal, I suggest you check out Carruthers and Kent just off Gosforth High Street.

She's hardly fucking Bella Emberg. She'd look skinny if she walked down the average high street. 'Big' by the standards of most film / TV stars though I suppose.

I was only messing with you, CT. I do struggle to get my head round the lack of age gap between us though. It's like you're from a different generation / dimension at times

Does any fucker know what these two are on about btw?

I can picture CT stepping out in the Toon circa 1988, in his dress pants, shirt and slip on shoes and saying (Peter Kay garlic bread-style) Acid? House?

It was fucking dire man, Jill. All that ansgt. You're good looking teenagers, you've got it made for fuck's sake. Wait until you get a job. Seriously though, they NEVER had a laugh, not once. It was all navel gazing, woe is me shit. I'd have given my left ball to shag Katie Holmes or Michelle Williams when I was in 6th form.

I think we're talking wet fart territory.

Sounds like Dawson's Creek.

Madison Avenue advertising agencies aren't exactly your typical 'normal blokes' like.

Did you not study any of this shit at school, CT? I know it seems like you're about 40 years older than me but in reality the gap's less than 10 years isn't it? I found this fascinating when we did it in GCSE History.