Alex

Shola's 'cult status' coincided with the club being at its lowest ebb in years.

:lol:

What they get up to in private is their business.

Failing that, if they chase you, just run up or down some stairs.

How old are you?

Nah, you're shit unless you hit the ground running in the PL. SPACEBAR!

Drum solos man Moby Dick by Led Zep comes on and you think to yourself this is mint then about a minute in it starts and you remember it's another 3 minutes (or something) of John Bonham basically pulling his pud before a decent 30 seconds til the end. You can't even blame the drugs as it would still sound shit.

A big club acting like a small club.

Looks exactly like CT's. CT's broccoli that is.

He's not allowed to kill anyone for a start.

I like Cream but the albums are ropey. Definitely a Greatest Hits band.

Things always work out exactly as humans planned so we've nothing to worry about.

Contrary to what TS said (I get the feeling he may have been taking the piss) Bushmills is more like Lowland Scotch in style than Irish whiskey so if you're after something similar then I'd go for Auchentoshan. That's if you were drinking the 10 year old malt. If it was the blended stuff then try Chivas Regal.

The bloke next door to my lass' mam had this done to his. Tree is ok but it looks a bit shit.

Or even if they'd appointed a semi-competent manager as opposed to JFK.

Home to Aston Villa with Schmeichal in goal?

Aye, he still does the videos. I only know because if you try and google the highlights / goals of our match you'll quite often get him on page one of the results giving his insight in a 'no nonsense' (i.e. sweary / constipated) manner.

Don't fucking forget to fucking mention that fucking true fucking Geordie fucking character. And how he tries to look hard, but just looks like he's passing a hard shit. Waaatz that aal aboot? As he would say.

Meeting Cockney Wanker and Frankie Fraser in the Blind Bigot.

I read somewhere (I had a quick google but can't verify this off the first few results at least) that in Nigeria they introduced the death penalty about 30 years ago for murder and car jacking after a spate of attacks. The murder rate went up but the carjacking didn't go down (the former because the assailants usually shot everyone in sight because they had nowt to lose). Although I do think certain offenders deserve death at best. I also don't see how the case of a bloke serving 20-odd years more than the minimum is an example of an available punishment being scandalously eroded. Not that I think Roberts should ever have gotten out. There's far more 'scandalous' examples of criminals getting out far too early I think.

That's the one.

R.I.P. Also the dad of Adam F.