wolfy

Definitely a red card and a sending off for Liverpool. I also believe it was a penalty because the fouling continued inside the box. I'd have liked to have seen how Liverpool would have coped if Middlesbrough did get the pen and scored, with Liverpool down to 10 men. To be totally honest, I would have liked to have seen Arsenal sneak the champions league spot as well as go on to win the FA cup, just to show the Arsenal fans up for the way they've treated Wenger, who may not have won a great deal but has produced some thoroughly enjoyable football for them over the years. I know many of their fans appreciate him but there was a growing number who think they were entitled to a better manager who will reap them huge rewards. Let's see what happens if Wenger takes a back seat.

A moth sees the light on at a dentists. The moth flies over and manages to get into the little open gap in the window then started fluttering around the light that the dentist uses to shine over the victim/patient. The dentist asked the moth why he was in there flying around the light, but the moth just kept fluttering around the light. 44 times the dentist asked the moth why he was fluttering around the light and 44 times the moth just kept on fluttering. It turned out that the dentist didn't realise that the moth couldn't actually talk. It also turns out that my jokes are absolutely crap and aren't really even a joke.

I watched that independence day resurgence the other night and had to fast forward it. The first one was watchable but this one was absolute crap, I thought.

A tiger walks into a pub followed by a lion, a grizzly bear and a kangeroo. All the people in the pub scream and run for their lives and very soon the pub is empty, apart from these 4 animals. The tiger shouts, "what the matter with everyone? It's as if we're being treated like gangsters or something." The barman shouts, "It's not that...it's due to the fact that you're wild animals and have fearsome reputations." The kangeroo is livid and pipes in. "ermmm, excuse me mister but don't lump me in with those three. I'm not looked on as having any fearsome reputation, so how about leaving me out of it." The tiger, the lion and the bear stare the kangeroo out and start threatening him, but the kangeroo stands his ground and says, "I'm not scared of any of you lot, so don't try and intimidate me, or the boxing gloves will be out and then we'll see who's got the bottle." All the other animals ignore the kangeroo and all order a pint of beer each and go and sit over in the far corner, leaving the kangeroo at the bar with the barman. The barman says, " what you having?" The kangeroo says, " ahhh just do me a pint of the old amber nectar." The barman says, " what's that like?" And the kangeroo says, " it's Fosters lager, man, what do you think it is?" The barman notices that the kangeroo is talking like a geordie and says, " how come you've got a sort of geordie accent?" And the kangeroo says, " because I've lived in Newcastle for years man, plus I'm a Newcastle united fan." Just as he said that, all the other animals looked over, after over hearing the kangeroo mention that he's a Newcastle fan and the tiger shouts, " I think you'd better leave the pub mate if you know what's good for you, because we're mackems and we're all gonna jump yeah and beat the crap out of yeah, plus bite you all over and leave you in a mess." The barman starts to crap himself and says, " ahhh come on mate, you'll have to leave or my pubs gonna end up a shambles. The kangeroo shouts, " nahhhh...do you have any boxing gloves behind that bar, or anywher in this pub, because I'll show you what I do to animals like that who threaten me." The barman, by this time is absolutely trembling with fear and mumbles " I'mmmmm.....I'mmmmmmmm sssss....sss...ssssorry Mr kangeroo but I don't have any boxing gloves in here." The kangeroo looks at the barman and says, " ahh well, never mind. I just thought you might have had a pair." Just then, the kangeroo hopped out and went home for his supper, leaving the other three to just talk about all kinds of stuff really. The end.

A security firm has has to downgrade due to cuts. They now use strong boxes strapped to donkeys when collecting takings. They're now called secureor.

A genuine proper legend who deserves all the plaudits. It's just a shame he couldn't have lifted a few trophies for us.

A hell of a read that. It's the type of stuff that I love to see from players playing for Newcastle. It reminds me of the Keegan days when the players would basically run bare foot over broken glass for him and the club. When Warren Barton was desperate to join and told Keegan he doesn't need to negotiate a contract as he'll trust the club to be fair. Hayden's giving me that feeling with Benitez and the club. I seen the good, the bad and the ugly at the club, many times over, over the years, like many of us have. I have a good feeling about things this time around. It'll be great if we can keep that Hayden mentality throughout, with the newbies who will come in to add to the quality that Rafa will keep on.

I loved that strip. I remember having the football sticker book with this team.

I think we have a massive chance to actually do something in the premier league with Rafa. As long as Ashley gives him the required funds, then I believe Rafa will get the right players to do a decent job over the next few years, with a real possibility of actually winning something and getting back to champions league football. It's a long shot at the moment, plus a bit pie in the sky, but the anticipation and excitement level has went up a good few notches, I think. And this is potentially throughout the club, not just with the fans. I'd love to us being talked about as a threat to the bigger teams and also back to the days where teams just didn't look forward to coming to St' James' Park. That last game against Barnsley will have given a massive glimpse of what the players and manager can expect should be win something big and/or qualify for the champions league over the next few years. Hopefully sooner...but I won't get too far above my station with greed.

That's a bit of a ropey question to be fair.

How long is a piece of string, basically.

Which one?

The secret pilot, eh?

Of course. I've thought about it for long enough. The foundation and the dome ensures no edge.

There is no edge.

Who's done it?

You can be what you want to be.

Which is why I answered.

Correct. So let's assume you sail towards the south from any position, where water allows and you reach your south pole edge. You need to get around it to the other side to carry on back to your north pole. How about if you went east or west?

Same as hulls and masts of ships. your horizon line meets lower light and higher light. Basically you see through more atmosphere the higher up you look and less the more level you look through the atmosphere. More molecules lower at sea level than higher. It may not appear a lot but it will remarkably change your viewing perspective. That's why you can see further if you elevate. Think of a lifeguard in a high chair/tower.

Which way on a globe you you set off from north to south? If I plant you bang in the middle of the so called north pole with your compass, then which way is south and which way is east and west?

No, because you have a vanishing point of ground and sky which become your horizon line. You will always see it at eye level no matter how high you are. The only change is the distance to the horizon, which depends on your height.

I think I know where you've been going wrong. We'll keep this as out little secret.

Any explanation for this. Distance and weather, etc? If not, bring up some that you're fairly sure of and we can discuss them.

No wind up. Up in a plane at height on a supposed globe would render your horizon not a horizon. The horizon is always your line of level horizontal sight. Move over a globe and you would lose it. It's basic and simple, but maybe too simple for people to actually bother with, because global stuff is passed off as magical concepts.