Meenzer

That's one of the things I like most about a lot of anti-gay attitudes. Take gays in the military, for example. "I don't want them anywhere near me, they'll try and have my bottom while I'm sleeping!" Not if you're an ugly, chinless, blockheaded soldier we won't, have you no idea how superficial we are?

Fisi is claiming he was too focused on passing Kubica to notice the light. Whereas Massa isn't even bothering to make excuses, saying he just didn't look.

My memory could be playing tricks with me here, but am I right in saying that Kubica waited at the red light while they actually passed him and went through it? If so, not only does that make them even bigger muppets, but you could argue it'd explain Kubica being pretty wound up in the subsequent laps if he felt he'd been unjustly overtaken, hence overdoing it a bit and crashing. I'm not saying Massa and Fisichella would need to have a guilty conscience if the outcome of the accident had been worse, but I do wonder if they're breathing a little sigh of relief...

Bloody hell On the contrary, I'd say you need to do exactly what most of us do - eat lots of chips and swill lots of beer.

Dinner tonight was a very virtuous salad with grilled chicken, mushrooms and cherry tomatoes. ...then two bowls of cereal afterwards because I was still hungry.

Anything that saves us from more of James Allen shooting his wad is fine by me.

Yep, I have to admit I got that gut feeling too, especially from the way his head was lolling - hard to forget the Ratzenberger/Senna weekend even now. Then again, with the benefit of hindsight, his head would be lolling if he was temporarily unconscious and trapped in an F1 car on its side... Delighted to hear his injuries aren't too serious. You've got to pay credit to the designers of the cars mind, I'm sure it's not coincidence that it was specifically the driver's section that survived intact.

So you've had the last laugh... the fine is really only about £1700! That'll teach 'em! I'm in Switzerland and the license fees are not that high. The licensing authorities don't often hand out fines either, but apparently a neighbour contacted them about me (why would anyone do that FFS?), hence the ridiculous fine. The former answers the latter, to be honest. They're close enough to Germany to share several of the same traits.

I do believe this gym thing is starting to work out. I'm still a long way from being properly fit, but I just ran five miles non-stop for the first time and don't feel too shagged-out either. Not a huge achievement in the grand scheme of things, I know, but given that I'd barely so much as run for the bus since finishing with P.E./games at school at age 16, I'm starting to have confidence that I might at least survive the summer five-a-side without having a massive heart attack.

Shouldn't be giving their money up like that, the selfless bastards.

Always forget how satisfying a good roast is (oh shush). I could probably quite happily live off roast potatoes alone

Class

Really interesting idea that, actually. (The Alex bit aside, obviously. ) Might compromise the atmosphere of the ground though. I wonder what options there'd be.

Got it?

What's the Union Jack got to do with it? Apart from the fact the entire UK is paying for London to get the benefits. True, Londoners aren't British, I forgot. Maybe something incorporating the Polish, Lithuanian and Ghanaian flags...

Reet, got some wholly inappropriate winter soup on the go... lentil, parsnip, carrot, leek and bacon.

Haven't got much in really. I want to make some soup today but I'm bloody hungry now. Might have to hit the corner shop for something gloriously unhealthy.

Gannin along the Scotswood Road and she was heavy laden Away we went on the Scotswood Road, that's on the road to Blaydon Scotswood Road, you should have seen us gannin Gannin along the Scotswood Road just as they were stannin All along the Scotswood Road, lads with smiling faces Gannin along the Scotswood Road to see the Blaydon Races (Well if we're going to get the words wrong, we might as well do it properly. )

Oops. Got distracted by Cubase aka The New Toy. Sorry

Well you're not getting mine hiya Meenz honey...no Iwon't soil you delicate area You know how to talk a good talk

Well you're not getting mine

And what was everyone else, yourself included, this past season? Fascinating pessimists, dahling.

Tsk tsk. I'm not done grooming Brock yet. Aye, only thing that prevented you from spiking me drink was that I was giving you a lift to the station. Well you'd have been sober again by the morning.

: It's from the Mark Ronson album 'Version' (which is really good). Ahh, should've been able to Google that for myself really. Ta, will check it out

Paris Hilton sent back to prison Celebrity heiress Paris Hilton has been taken screaming from a Los Angeles court after being told to return to jail to serve out her sentence. The celebrity heiress was ordered to attend the hearing rather than listen to the proceeding by telephone. Hilton left jail on Thursday, just three days into a 45-day sentence for violating probation on a driving ban. Her release from the prison, on unspecified medical grounds, had sparked widespread criticism. Hilton attended court to hear the case for her "reassignment" to house arrest. She arrived in handcuffs and cried throughout the court session. The judge said that she would have to serve her full 45-day sentence. "It's not right!" she shouted in response, before calling out to her mother in the audience. She has been held at the Century Regional Detention Centre in Lynwood, California, in a special unit for celebrities, public officials, police officers and other high-profile inmates, and has so far served five days of her sentence. No details of the medical problem have been given for "privacy reasons".