Meenzer

Is that the version of "You've Got A Friend" where they chop bits of it to squeeze it into 30 seconds so that each line has a different number of beats and barely resembles the original? And more importantly, is it only me who gets wound up to an entirely irrational extent by that kind of thing?

Not bad for someone with a budget of £0.

Male or female? Railway.

h4ppy b123h44y.

Spectacular. Really sorry to hear that Cath, the whole thing fucking stinks.

Spirit of fair play, that's us.

Come on Aisam-ul-Haq Qureshi!

BBC Twat: "Rafael, this is a tournament you would love to win above all other tournaments, is it?" Nadal: (laughs) "Err... I dunno..." Class.

Aaand he's through. I'm glad for him actually, it'd be great if he did well this year after everyone's written him off. But christ there are some mongs in the crowd.

Villa improved by 5 places, I think thats an improvement that alot of clubs would be encouraged by having previously finished 16th in the league. Must have helped their average ranking in the Premiership, anyway.

11-11 in the final set now. BBC: "Henman Snr looks like the sort of chap whose definition of emotional contact with his son would be a handshake twice a year - once on his birthday, and once on Christmas Day."

Never got the wrestling thing at all. With hindsight, a bunch of muscled men faking grapple sessions while oiled up should have been my kind of thing really, but I've never been one for faking it.

Oh sweet lord, why is he wearing the Clay Aiken Jacket of Doom?

Excellent, might get more than 10p for my "On Your Own" 7" single now.

I suppose one assumes the "double murder-suicide" wasn't carried out by the son, say. It doesn't specifically rule it out though.

"His hug with Eddie at WrestleMania XX was one of wrestling's most memorable moments - and will now never, ever be forgotten." Well I'm glad they've got a sense of perspective about it all. RIP anyway...

Well I liked it.

Tom Waits cover anyway. I was going to say. Don't diss the Waits or there'll be aggro and bitch-slapping.

Pssht, "Bad Girl" was lersh. Bit gay though.

You sure you don't mean yes. Who you asking!

No?

Which one is you? Surprised you had to ask since you were standing at the back when the photo was taken

Definitely "Blind Date".

There isn't a Pimms marquee for fucking miles around either.

Ah, but you're ignoring a major issue here - so much land is being used for biofuel farming in Germany that nobody is growing ingredients for breweries any more, so beer prices are set to rocket It must be true, I read it in Bild...