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BBC Twat: "Rafael, this is a tournament you would love to win above all other tournaments, is it?" Nadal: (laughs) "Err... I dunno..." Class.

Aaand he's through. I'm glad for him actually, it'd be great if he did well this year after everyone's written him off. But christ there are some mongs in the crowd.

Villa improved by 5 places, I think thats an improvement that alot of clubs would be encouraged by having previously finished 16th in the league. Must have helped their average ranking in the Premiership, anyway.

11-11 in the final set now. BBC: "Henman Snr looks like the sort of chap whose definition of emotional contact with his son would be a handshake twice a year - once on his birthday, and once on Christmas Day."

Never got the wrestling thing at all. With hindsight, a bunch of muscled men faking grapple sessions while oiled up should have been my kind of thing really, but I've never been one for faking it.

Oh sweet lord, why is he wearing the Clay Aiken Jacket of Doom?

Excellent, might get more than 10p for my "On Your Own" 7" single now.

I suppose one assumes the "double murder-suicide" wasn't carried out by the son, say. It doesn't specifically rule it out though.

"His hug with Eddie at WrestleMania XX was one of wrestling's most memorable moments - and will now never, ever be forgotten." Well I'm glad they've got a sense of perspective about it all. RIP anyway...

Well I liked it.

Tom Waits cover anyway. I was going to say. Don't diss the Waits or there'll be aggro and bitch-slapping.

Pssht, "Bad Girl" was lersh. Bit gay though.

You sure you don't mean yes. Who you asking!

No?

Which one is you? Surprised you had to ask since you were standing at the back when the photo was taken

Definitely "Blind Date".

There isn't a Pimms marquee for fucking miles around either.

Ah, but you're ignoring a major issue here - so much land is being used for biofuel farming in Germany that nobody is growing ingredients for breweries any more, so beer prices are set to rocket It must be true, I read it in Bild...

amazing eh? I'll bet you never thought of that as a job when you were growing up............... My old man worked in sponsorship and corporate image, so a career dealing in bullshit was almost inevitable.

WOOP WOOP! SPACKA ALERT! shurrup man ginge...!!! I had drank too much vodka yesterday Best kept secret on the board, that.

Bravo! ...unless you were unconscious by 4pm and the slammers were your breakfast, in which case Boo!

Sorry Laz, been away for the weekend so just seen this. No - it's generally done by general surgeons who do lots of other things aswell. They do have specialist endoscopy nurses who's sole job it is to assist/look after the people having cameras shoved up their arses and down their throats all day every day (yes, the scopes are sterilised inbetween )I think I'd rather stick pins in my eyes than do that job. Aye good job because if I walk in there tomorrow and you're stood there'll be hell on I tells ya! 'specially if she's still rat-arsed after her big weekend away. Might struggle to find the right hole

I translate nonsensical German business-speak into equally nonsensical English business-speak.

hibby beedy!

Seen as you get so much stick on here, I'll be nice to you You do have a fantastic vocabulary Dave. Don't get used to this sort of thing btw it's taken me 3 and a half hours to come to a decision. I think this is a compliment so I'm going to take it as such. I've been trying to weigh up whether you were taking the piss or being genuine So much for choosing your vocabulary wisely. Sitting duck anyone?