Meenzer

Bored. Anyone on Facebook fancy a game of Scrabble?

Quick, let's all post in a 3-5-2 formation to confuse the lad.

"Robert finally leaves" "former Newcastle star and Portsmouth player" Some nice turns of phrase there.

He hates you so much his eyes were instinctively drawn to your name.

Oh I assure you, there's plenty of us who don't find Wacky amusing in the least.

5th best pub on the Great North Road. Fact!

More flirting, but a damn sight less footsie.

I was already halfway to posting it when you mentioned Emmerdale and barn dancing. Further proof of our deep psychic connection, if proof were needed.

Like this?

It's even got that slightly bemused facial expression with which you tackle the trials and tribulations of everyday life.

Reunion? That would require actual planning. I bet it ends up with half a dozen people having a drink in the Three Mile on Christmas Eve or something.

Mr. Farquharson told me it was an ice lolly.

I was going to say, I presume the tax £££ from the football industry is a huge money-spinner for the government. Of course, they spend it all on housing for rapist immigrants, so you can't win.

I've said it before and I'll say it again... Much better.

Where's the punchline?

Martin we've all heard some of your Glorified Serbian Spoon Contests you listen to. Hey, I reckon any prog rock album would be brightened up by a bit of boom-bang-a-bang.

Class. I remember Pav being thoroughly confused when we shouted at him from the top of the shopping centre on Gosforth High Street. "But ze noises... zey are komink from above my head?"* * That's how Czech people speak, see.

£4.50?! Are you sure you're not accidentally shopping in Asda one day and Harrods Food Hall the next?

I've always been put off Floyd by their terrible lyrics, but I suspect that's missing the point a little...

Fremantle Prison! They went there on the Amazing Race, I've seen it and everything. Which, admittedly, isn't quite as impressive as actually having gone there. But hey.

That squidgy bit on the right, everyone knows that!

Erm... can I claim "exceptions that prove the rule"?

Aye, big frames do look ridiculous like. I can't be doing with contacts, too much hassle (even the one-use ones) and I prefer the look of myself with glasses, it makes even the daftest twat look vaguely intellectual.

As opposed to your healthy attitude towards short-sightedness in this and the other thread today.

The better half listening to maudlin country music while he puts together the bibliography for some deathly-dull Serbian essay.