Meenzer

So completely and utterly wrong. But so damn good.

Just been out to get some groceries. The Lah'n E'nin Stannah headline today: "Earthquake Hits London". Rightio.

Quick as a wink, sharp as a tack!

Same technique they use to identify deafness in children, interestingly enough.

That just makes them very unserious, shallow, silly and trifling.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding. Totally insubstantial, but I found myself enjoying it anyway, which is conclusive proof that I've been turned into a woman by my relationship - I've never felt closer in kin to Smooth Operator than today. I'll be watching Requiem For A Dream tonight to redress the balance.

I've had this bookmarked to watch for weeks. Tonight I'm sleepless enough to do it. It was stupidly impressive.

The earth didn't move for me.

I've been to the Cheers bar too (not that that's where they filmed it, nor is it even actually called Cheers). Didn't notice a red arrow and the word "CUNT" hovering above my head though. Some people have all the luck.

Good to know our licence fee is being well spent, anyway. (© Daily Mail)

Me too.

If they're too retarded to remember what it's about from one visit to another, they deserve everything they get.

I haven't heard anything about a change to the voting system, though they really need to make it so only the finalists vote in the final and not all the losing semi-finalists too, because the whole thing goes on faaaar too long as it is. And Scotland can't enter until they secede from the UK, because they're already represented by anything the BBC enters. Exactly. Neighbouring countries voting for each other is entirely understandable really, particularly when they enter their big stars who are popular across national borders - and Wogan thinks Lithuania and Macedonia are "neighbours" so I wouldn't trust his opinion on the subject anyway... Particularly since he never seems to complain about the UK routinely shovelling points Ireland's way (not that we did last year, mind). There is a problem with immigrant/second-/third-generation people voting for the country of their heritage, viz. the big votes to Turkey from Germany, Armenia from Belgium/Netherlands etc. (and UK/Ireland for that matter), but it's hard to see a way around that really. Maybe get the expert juries back in and make it 50/50 jury/televote, I dunno. Well, we'd elected Blair two days earlier and he hadn't had time to become a warmongering liar yet, but I reckon they probably liked us because we entered a decent middle-of-the-road song that was performed competently. God forbid we ever start doing that again, obviously.

Aye, I made that point on the first page. Still worth taking the piss out of though.

They probably have the best song, to be honest, but I expect them to be shocking live singers. In which case I'd expect the Revelations or Rob from the Joseph show to win, since their songs are closer to the Eurovision "norm". I suspect there's not one of them would get more than 30 points at the contest proper, though.

You rule. Spectacularly happy birthday to you.

That's right, you tell the brainwashed hippy!

Aye, pipe down Jonny, you're slowing the bandwagon.

I love how any kind of majority opinion is automatically a "bandwagon". Stop feeling so sorry for yourself and grow some balls man.

She was really pretty with her "normal" look. When she dressed up all butch I thought she bore a striking resemblance to Jade Goody, though...

Aye, the point about having your bits outside your body changing the way you behave is one I've seen before, but it was well demonstrated. I do hope she didn't put that lemon back in the kitchen afterwards though.

First reactions: "I thought it had already been exposed as a hoax?" and "I wonder if John Howards' favourite singer is George Michaels?". Either way, that "Piss off - we're full!" picture always amuses me. The way it's scrawled on the cliffs of Dover, as if written by a 6-year-old who's been told to do it by his fat, tattooed, Mail-reading fatha. And, of course, the way it so often gets used by militant Geordies who hate Southerners with a passion until and unless they're torching immigrants.

It's hard to say. I agree with what one of the lasses said, in that there's definitely an element of thinking we're "better" than straight couples when it comes to violent relationships, and yet there've been plenty of exposés in the gay press etc. that seem to suggest otherwise. And it stands to reason that the stereotypical "bitch/butch" relationship model (for gay men and lesbians alike) would give rise to the kind of power discrepancies that might engender violent behaviour in certain types of people or certain circumstances. Can't really judge it myself though - most of the gay (and straight) couples I know seem functional enough, or hide it well if they're not...

I think it was just the all-pervading atmosphere of heavily charged fishsex. That and being stared at by a group of militant dykes insistent on no boys ever accompanying their female friends into the place. It's a nice friendly scene really.

I did actually. Recognised most of the Soho locations, to my shame, and my fella had the most terrifying night of his life in that Candy Bar place. Was that in Brighton or London. The one where she had the shorts on?? London, assuming it's the same place I'm thinking of anyway!