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Maybe if I had Fred Goodwin's salary.

Aye, happy birthday fella, and don't be so subtle next time, you know we can't handle it.

Hello Zath.

Well if you will live near Lange Reihe.

In my experience, those surveys classify things far more innocuous than bum-bashing as "homosexual activity". If you've hugged a bloke at the match after a goal you're probably in the 10%.

That's the problem with these irregularly-shaped countries, they just don't realise they're irregularly-shaped. We need to impose Wyoming-style latitude- and longitude-based borders throughout the world. Where's Dubya when you need him?

Someone should probably inform Mrs. Renton.

I'm getting a distinct sense of Jàdé vu.

That Live Aid type thing for the G8 a couple of years ago (I forget the title) was a classic - the tickets were free but there was a huge fuck off VIP area in front of the stage just for corporate guests. You mean Bono hasn't given all his money away to help starving people. What little he has left after flying his hat first-class, that is.

Sometimes it feels like you could start a thread on here containing just one word - "ARGUMENT", say - and 12 pages later a handful of people would have got bogged down in a tug-of-war debate on the shape of the letter "M".

Jesus, I never realised the bullshit of our professional lives was quite so closely linked.

Well that'd certainly fit with the rest of East London. A return to a sense of scale would be nice after the excesses of Beijing. Then again, I imagine the organisers are so paranoid about being seen to have "failed" that they won't entertain the prospect unless it becomes a financial necessity.

Turnout at the next election will be fascinating. I can imagine there'll be a lot of shoulder-shrugging from people who won't vote Labour again but can't bring themselves to go with one of the other options. Wouldn't surprise me if we even get a couple of BNP MPs as a result.

I can understand that. It can change, of course - see the Lib Dems in Newcastle after however many years of Labour - but it tends to need a hell of a lot of perseverance by a consistent group of people in the face of a long struggle. Mind you, you'd think with Labour's ongoing national collapse that someone would be targeting other local councils. It'll be interesting to see how the Tyneside parliamentary seats shape up next year. I tend to prefer local politics myself - I can get a handle on schools, potholes, dogshit and recycling collections far more than I can the broad strokes of nationwide policy statements - but I can fully understand any apathy towards it, particularly in places where voting doesn't offer any realistic prospect of change. You don't half get some nutjob councillors too.

It's only the start. I'm getting bored of the "media fabrication" line, too. It's not like the media weren't quick to trumpet the fake boom.

Bit cumbersome.

And, inevitably, http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society...n-200903231656/

http://www.septicisle.info/2009/03/world-mourns.html

I shouldn't worry too much Magma, your time will come. And it's not like you need to worry about having galloping nob-rot or owt like that. SMO on the other hand...... And once the right person has been and gone in double-quick time, don't forget to have fun with a bunch of wrong 'uns afterwards.

Ghost Bees - Vampires of the West Coast http://www.myspace.com/ghostbees Trying to decide whether to go and see them on Wednesday night. It's only a fiver, but it does involve leaving the house.

I don't remember shagging a decimal point?

Two tickets to this year's Eurovision Preview Party at the Scala in dirty old Kings Cross.

Must be a 'southern/northern' thing. It was always considered a canny job up here to be working the bins. Dahn sarf, starting out as a binman can lead to things like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AX6P8Wde5ag

I think we should take his DNA just to be sure. To clone an army? God, imagine that. George Galloway standing for Respect in every single parliamentary constituency.

I think we should take his DNA just to be sure.