Meenzer

attends environmental protests dressed as a genetically modified chicken

Fantabulous, old bean. Just back off a particularly good holiday. Not to mention my first game of the season last night ending in a victory Hope you're all fine and dandy? Yessir. Just moved into a new flat so things are gradually returning to normal. The future-mother-in-law is visiting this weekend but otherwise nothing too much to report.

Hullo Snakey. Long time no chat. All well?

has a dirty brown arse?

Unless you are Senna Or Schumacher in Monaco qualifying. Those two were both excellent drivers though. I wouldn't trust Piquet Jr to parallel park a Renault Clio outside his front door, never mind deliberately prang a racecar.

Either that or Piquet is a bitter wee man with nothing better to do any more. I suppose it's feasible, but it's not as if Alonso was challenging for the title or anything. Then again, Renault still hadn't won a race by that stage of the season, so maybe their sponsors were getting antsy...

I've been at lunchtime before, the lunch set menu isn't bad. I think they had sausages and mash if you really don't feel like fish. Nice place, anyway.

should realise that "lakewater" and "cyclist" are just as bad as each other when it comes to names for drinks

Be sure to take precautions though. Some of the Polish stuff is decent. There's a shop across the road that keeps me well stocked with Zywiec and the like. First choice would be anything from the Leffe family though, the Brune and Radieuse ones are lurvely.

Excellent, so we can look forward to a further ten albums of "live for your tooooooooys/though they make noiiiiiiiiiiise"-style lyrical brilliance then.

Fisi on top, Badoer last. Fucking ace.

is photoshoped

Drinks with "amusing innuendo"-type names are an instant no-no.

I had a peppermint tea in Berlin last week that was an actual peppermint infusion, leaves in the glass type thing. I'll be sticking to teabags in future. (*awaits inevitable "teabagging" edit*)

likes to play chess in drag

Alsterwasser is by far the worst offender mentioned in this thread so far. For the uninitiated, it's what yer northern Germans call shandy.

clearly can't resist clicking on it anyway

wants it shaken not stirred

and only then? Especially then, but not only then. The happy hour part is particularly pertinent as a general rule, I find.

All cocktails are fine if you're out with your workmates and ordering pint-sized drinks during happy hour at a Mainz cocktail bar in an effort to scare the Germans and blot out the futility of your financial-translation-based existence.

is a lovely fluffy character with a wet nose

Wine's OK if you're out somewhere as long as there's two or more of you sharing a bottle, I reckon. Buying by the glass? Less so. Especially if it's rosé.

Even if one of your dads was Greg Evigan? Bloody hell, I watched that regularly and all.

That Schumacher/Coulthard incident and the fallout.