Meenzer

Aye, you wouldn't be surprised to see "Messi pen (90+11)" in the records for this one, would you

Your statement is invalid

Howay, we all love a good upset no matter how abhorrent the regime concerned.

Well that's a big country decision

The Saudi captain's name is pronounced Al-Farage, which is nice

I am not, @BBCMOTD, I am not.

What's up with the Dutch orange colour? It looks like orange squash.

They beat Cambodia 14-0 and 10-0 in qualifying, let's show them some respect.

It's coming homo

Get Trippier on long shot duty ASAP

Danny Drinktattywater

Peter Withe A Pint In His Hand. #OnTopic

In that case... Nigel Spunk

Just because Wales have finally qualified for a World Cup, there's no need for that

I have no vested interest in ensuring that this takes place and certainly wouldn't want to know exactly what minute of the game they were planning it for

Mind, our squad are a fairly metrosexual bunch. I reckon a couple of them would be up for snogging in front of the corner flag camera.

Shame really. In a tournament where your squad has 26 players and you can make five subs per game, if the teams really wanted to still make the statement without risking losing their best players, they could. Like, get a less central member of the squad like the third GK to start the game with the armband, take the yellow card, then immediately sub them. Once they're banned after the second game, repeat with another junior squad member for as long as you're in the tournament. Obviously that'd be ridiculous too, but if anything it'd highlight the ridiculousness of the wider situation even more effectively.

I was going to go with Ha-Cans Şükür but this is better

Danny Drinkwater

This is fun (in a nerdy kind of way). Requires a bit of lateral thinking and educated guesswork as you narrow down the options:

I'm willing to bet the 1930 tournament didn't have huge viewing figures.

Garang Coca-Kuola