Meenzer

Other than the sexy fortnight in Düsseldorf, I won a Guardian competition for a three-day break to Evian-les-Bains on Lake Geneva, so we'll be taking that in August and no doubt feeling thoroughly out of place in amongst all that lovely money.

Oh, wait, thickguymick is a DEADMAN wind-up. Suddenly it all falls into place.

I reckon he's Tim Krul on account of being unbelievable.

lol

CT's diet plan in full:

Next step water-loading

Two weeks in Düsseldorf

If only.

That'll learn you for not using proper pepper

Well deserved too!

I didn't think we came across as stuck up cunts. So what they mean is we're not 15 years old.

9 sets to 0 for Djokovic in his quarter, semi (vs. Federer) and the final. Pretty impressive for someone who's been a bit of a choker in his time too, even if Murray did make it easy for him. That said, if Murray doesn't get a slam in the next year or two now that Federer's on the slide and Nadal's body is breaking, he never will.

I bet spew looks good on the dancefloor.

Paddy Power had Man U at 6/4 draw no bet at half-time, so I stuck a bit on that. You know what they're like. I've also got the same bet in a slightly odd double with Djokovic to beat Murray tomorrow, so from me too!

Floating on air after a typically awesome performance by Justin Townes Earle (with a side order of baffled on learning that Blue are reforming to do Eurovision this year ).

Sounds canny actually. I'd still be bristling all the way through the film and muttering "I used to pay two quid at the Jesmond Picture House" under my breath though.

WHAT

Eleven pages in and still no sign of this? How Ruud!

Aye

I remember the poor sod standing in for John Craven on Newsround who had to be the first on the BBC to break the news, and on kids' TV too. Not exactly 24-hour rolling news...

Nice analogy. Unfortunately mine's more of a multipack. Was going to hit the gym to watch Everton-Chelsea but apparently it's on ESPN and the ITV match isn't until later. Suppose I'd better go anyway.

Justin Townes Earle gig tonight at the Union Chapel. Supoib. Might have to cope with a couple of drinks in Camden beforehand though.

In the interests of balance, I should add that I'm off out for beers with friends afterwards. But I'm still more excited about the TV gameshow.

I'll take Australia, Chelsea and Man U tomorrow. £5 returns £38.