Meenzer

I'd say the number of homicides and the level of media coverage are both excessive.

Guns don't kill people, bullets do.

I'm watching Wizards of Waverly Place on Disney. I'm now starting to think they might not actually be wizards.

Y

Sounds reasonable to me. I rank it alongside "United" when it comes to football-related speech crime.

Don't worry, the EPL is starting again soon

OK, I have to say that was a masterful move. Bravo.

http://mofarahrunningawayfromthings.tumblr.com/

And an upstairs bit. Or is that only open when they can be bothered? I haven't been in for a couple of years mind.

http://www.die.net/earth/ The URL contains the word "die". They're even spelling out the conspiracy for us right there.

Ah, but is it the ball that's rotating around the pole or the pole that's rotating around the ball?

THEY want you to be looking at the skies so you don't notice THEM installing a radio transmitter in your back yard.

Back in the early 1990s, THEY kidded a generation of horny teenagers into believing in the existence of Red Hot Dutch.

From the Germans man. Tell them Poland wants Klose and Podolksi's World Cup goals back then.

The xx would have been hilarious like. The ultimate "fuck you" to the party vibe.

http://www.opendemocracy.net/ourbeeb/alex-macpherson/after-olympic-feast-can-bbc-sport-really-return-to-diet-of-football-football Stating the obvious in many ways I suppose, but still basically spot on. What price the return of Grandstand?

Jan Moir capturing the zeitgeist perfectly as ever.

Disqualified and stripped of gold due to drug fiendery. Who knew?!

The former is meant to be. While the latter has been the source of plenty of "humour" on here (Wacky, I'm looking at you ) but is legit. Of course, if you want somewhere overpriced, soulless, devoid of Newcastle fans but near your hotel, you're welcome to http://www.thesportscafe.com/london

The Germans' candidate city for the 2012 Olympics was Leipzig. This still amuses me to no end.

http://www.halfway2heaven.net/ Mind, a couple of rounds in the Traf Square/Soho neck of the woods will set you back as much as a ticket to ver Bridge. Anyway, I haven't been for a while but the Cock and Lion (just behind Oxford Street near Bond Street) is a traditional gathering point for our fans in the big smoke: http://www.beerintheevening.com/pubs/show.shtml/84/Cock_and_Lion/Bond_Street

We'd done the history thing in the opening ceremony though. The closing is just meant to be one last daft pissup.

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/arts-entertainment/45-year-old-salesman-apologises-for-closing-ceremony-2012081337959

Stratford station today: