Meenzer

Having just pissed in the corner?

Everything about that is appalling.

Everything about that is appalling.

A-A-B-B-A, FFS.

Failing that, take the more rustic approach and Clarkson him:

That's akin to ILLEGALLY DOWNLOADING A ROAD

@YouveBeenHodged is magnificent. https://twitter.com/YouveBeenHodged

"Shall we sign despair or despair?"

"We're after your help, too. Security footage of a speedophile disguised as a traffic police training school. He's been getting away with it just off the A167 for twelve years. Do you know him? Have you seen him? Please call."

Leazes'd your post

It's like a coming-out. It's nobody's business really, and yet it is.

So you can get away with your speedo showing 35 in a 30 or 70 in a 60 then. Tricky business...

Or he's just triggered a nuclear meltdown on a screen-sized 8-bit game of Sim City.

Don't let that be said! It'll inflate his head And make his hairline even thinner

For once I wasn't actually having a go, though I'm happy enough for my words to be taken that way

As has the way the Internet has changed. Or at least you notice a different approach to things among people who've always had the internet in their lives and people who discovered it at a later date. I think, anyway.

I took the liberty of editing the title description.

Chelsea technically swapped Nemanja Matic and £20m for Nemanja Matic.

Though no longer on the gravy train Baldie Fish has no grounds to complain He can fritter away His redundancy pay On a lifetime supply of Regaine

But sadly this 80s recital Had only a limited lifecycle Though he tried eagerly Talent-wise, our CT Was the Ridgeley to Meenzer's George Michael

CT, in a quest to keep eating Without having to move from his seating, Yelled proudly: "Behold! My food never goes cold Now my sofa has underfloor heating!"

Ralf Keidel for an undersoil heating unit