adios

Expect a bill for my premierleaguepass this month.

The fuckwit co-commentator is Danny Mills btw.

Jesus Fucking Kentucky Fried Christ.

Yeah this is still working for me, cheers, thought I'd get banned. Glad I payed for it now.

Does anyone know a decent body of water? Preferably of the Ace variety.

One word. Ginger.

Thank you. I'm grand now. Bit disconcerting to pass out in the ambulance and wake up with a beard.

They were all out of the iPhone 6 plus

Also I'm on a nexus 10 which probably makes things even more difficult?

Same here, except I'd rather be stuck in Hawaii than this fecking hospital bed.

Still prefer Carver to Pardew. He's basically the same calibre but allows the players to get forward more (not that that's saying a lot).

I seriously wonder if he knows how to work out the Maths of the Premier League table.

Yeah, that's fucking shocking. And 6 in 6 is pretty decent? That'll avoid relegation most years I suppose. FFS.

Had to laugh when Pardew subbed the left back, then not to be outdone, Carver sticks on 2.

Terrible match. Sissoko and Perez on a bit of a bad run now. Gouffran and Williamson dogshit.

No way this team gets relegated. Just enough quality (laughs). Also Carvinho will win the Champions' League within 5 years. Taking all bets.

Thought you were retiring to the bath.

Looking forward to watching this for some reason even though it's got awful draw written all over it.

If the 3 serious responses aren't seen as positives, I think we're taking the piss with our expectations.

Sissoko, Janmaat, Perez, Williamson.

Does the fact that you've remained confident about so many things that haven't come to pass not shake that confidence?

Also thought Anita was a bag of shite. Sissoko played one ball onto Cabella's head in the 11th(?) minute that was sublime. He wasn't terrible, but defo not a good game from him.

Ah yeah, there was a lot negative about it, I'm just saying that I go into it expecting fuck all and focus on the bright spots like that.