Sicklee Sausage

Women say they're not into something; what they actually mean is they don't want to do it with you. No doubt they'll be doing that thing with someone else while you're at work, that was 'weird and pervy' when you suggested it.

In other news, a couple reveal their baby scan which looks remarkably similar to Tom Chaplin, the lead singer of the piano-rock group Keane. Unfortunately it turns out the child has Down's Syndrome.

Ermmmmm, yeah, pretty much Now then, I think WD40 is an excellent addition to every household - a real 'must have' for any home. I once knew a fella who got confused between WD40 and KY Jelly Maybe they hadn't had sex for a while and felt a bit ring-rusty.

I believe a lot of hoteliers and men running b&b's frequent that bar. Just go in there, and make it known that you're looking for a bed for the night.

Germany could select him and we'd still lose on penalties.

Regardless of the rights and wrongs in referring to someone as 'black', there was absolutely no need to put that on the receipt. Who else would have ordered fried chicken and watermelon?