ewerk

David Brent would be proud of him.

That's not quite the flex he thinks it is. If anything it shows the utter madness that Arteta has spent £750m and not a single penny of that was on a proven goal scorer that would have given them a chance last night.

Bring this back! Actually on second thoughts…

I had no idea that Toffs offered that sort of service.

This game.

Did you not used to have a picture of a young blond fella as your avatar? I always assumed it was you.

Well there you have it. It has been declared by the board elder and his much younger, sexier and smarter colleague that you all need to:

Lads we’ve lost one of our last eight matches. Chill the fuck out.

Well that’s a lie.

Fair enough, my mistake. But still, IMAGINE!

Why? It was only last season they were playing in the EL.

Everything you say is correct but he’s a striker. From what I hear a lot of old pros saying, the best strikers are incredibly selfish and focussed on themselves. That’s the only reason I’d be worried. Then again which sides in the top European leagues are guaranteed PL football? I’m not convinced about Liverpool and it’s not that long since they didn’t qualify for it. Man City are pretty much the only shoo in along with PSG and the three big Spanish sides.

I genuinely thought you were in your late teens/early twenties.

We lost the fight for youth when Kevin walked out.

Aye, Murphy has played a lot of football this season. I wouldn’t mind seeing Gordon on the left and Barnes on the right.

Simple Jack gets his goal. That’ll be him on a run now until the end of the season.

Nope. Last minute pen to Chelsea.

The iceman cometh.

They did try.

At last.

What the fuck is VAR looking at now?

Now watch us miss it.

Finally getting a penalty.

Set up for a Schar thundercunt.