Howmanheyman

"Roger that Alpha-Pie, We'll RV outside Maccy D's at 16.00 hours, that's an affirmative, over."

I'm tempted to buy one but I'd never wear it.

Didn't realise you'd been in the Forces, CT.

I've been looking for the barcode one for a bit, had one with 'Greenall's' on it which I bought in Belfast, strangely enough. It got nicked on a lads holiday in Spain, a year later I got it again this time with the blue star on but it's long gone now. It's a pity you can't get them with the original 'Umbro' logo on as there always seems something missing. Plus 'Score Draws' shirt material isn't the greatest.

He's a knob, pure and simple.

Breath of 'familiar' air, maybe?

Did about three YTS schemes in my time. Wrapped one in more or less straight away as even if I'd got the job at the end of it with my placement it wasn't what I wanted to do, another one was similar and an equal waste of time. The only one that might have been any good I left for a full time job as t was a guaranteed wage and most of my mates were working as they were older and I was sick of being skint on £36 a week. Once nipped in and chose a FLT course for a couple of weeks whilst out of work rather than be forced to work on a meaningless 'warehouse' course for 6-12 months for dole money plus a tenner. (The ET scheme). Luckily I've never been in as bad a state since and any stints out of work have been a few months at worst and that's bad enough.

Was considering doing that with the family as I've the time off anyway but there wasn't anything cheap or suitable. Would've got the train up on the day.

I don't think Greenalls were our sponsor when we had the yellow away shirt. Potential bollock dropped I reckon*. (Still a great shirt especially the top two). * Might have been switched mid-season come to think of it.

Fletcher just been stretchered off at Hampden. He doesn't look in agony or anything but I don't think he'll playing in the derby.

Saw '127 hours' last night. Decent enough film about a lad being trapped by a rock and having to cut his arm off to survive. Based on a true story.

Sorry but a lot of these people have already done something for their benefits, they paid tax when they have worked. I'm against these schemes too and think they should be voluntary only or should have an enhanced payment rather than dole money plus expenses or the 'extra-Tenner' scheme.

John, an ex-Squaddie gets through to the interview stage at Newcastle City Council for a job there. After a brief interview the interviewer asks John to expand a bit on the medical part of his application. John explains that he was hit in the groin area with a bit of shrapnel in Iraq and consequently lost his testicles. He also mentioned his caffeine allergy. "No problem, John!" said the interviewer, "We like to accommodate everybody here at Newcastle City Council regardless of disability, religion and race. We also like to employ ex-servicemen as well so I'm pleased to offer you the job!" John gladly accepts and asks what time they start work at his department? "Well it's nine AM to five PM for everyone else but you will be starting at eleven till five instead." "Why's that?" asks John. The interviewer replies, "Here at Newcastle City Council we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls for the first couple of hours so it's pointless you coming in till then".

I've a BMI of 23 according to that.

Sounded like a canny atmosphere going on there even in the expensive seats.

We need a few Jedi's in the team as well. Jedi's and Geordies.

I left the house to go to work the second stevie wonder blew his whistle to end the game on Sunday. Got to work in a foul mood and then discovered I'd left my phone and bait at home.

Take no notice of the mackem sympathisers and 'fair play' merchants, essembee.

'You fools' Am fucking wounded by that insult, mind.

I'm short on holidays and now need to take one off for the derby. (if I can get it off!)

Third time in recent years we've had a player put out for the season at Wigan and not a red in sight, Cattermole did Barton one year then someone else the next IIRC.

We've just had a real tough game on thursday and they're off the back of a good win at Goodison plus it looks like Cabaye is out and our record down there is poor. I'll be pleased if we don't lose to be perfectly honest and will lap up a rare away win.

Saw loads of empty seats and not for the first time at Parkhead yesterday.

How many tickets do you usually give away fans for European games, mate?