Howmanheyman

http://www.sportingpreview.com/gpb2013/000031.php

I asked that lot to make me on offer on an old shirt that David Kelly wore back in 1992-93 and they offered me £100. (I wasn't planning on selling but wanted a valuation).

Recommend it on monday then, you scouse twat!

Am on that adidas site now but so far far everything I've looked isn't my size the bassers!

£70 (But I did sell a few unwanted bits and bobs so in reality I wasn't out of pocket). Wished I'd kept my original my gear in good shape, now.

In superb nick as well despite it's age.

Whatever happened to Holsten pils and did you drink it?

It must've been an interesting conversation when you asked your folks about the birds and the bees, CT. ".......So Dad, when my willy gets that tingly feeling, and when the white wee-wee comes out, is that when I have a baby?"

Do they think the long, slow, drawn out 'When the Spurs go marching in' song is as good as any football song around or do they think pulling their teeth out with a rusty blunt pair of pliers is preferable to singing/hearing it?

He's most definitely droppable, his performance against Sunderland was dire, it's when he's not on top of his game that he's hard work for his teammates and manager. He's also still not in tip top condition imo. It's a hard call though as how do you know if he's going to be Villa away Ben Arfa or mackems away Ben Arfa? (Or is he going to be JFK's Ben Afrie, even?)

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Newcastle-United-shirt-SYLVAIN-MARVEAUX-Signed-12-x-8-photo/200957439770?_trksid=p2045573.m2042&_trkparms=aid%3D111000%26algo%3DREC.CURRENT%26ao%3D1%26asc%3D27%26meid%3D2535447741392787894%26pid%3D100033%26prg%3D1011%26rk%3D1%26rkt%3D4%26sd%3D200957439770%26 (Leave this on your lap top when your lass is around, CT, she may get the hint for a stocking filler).

I called 'Cain Dingle' ages ago. AND I WAS RIGHT!!

Jonas? Sorry CT, We've other fish to fry.

I'd also add his 'Mike Ashley' posts have slipped to non league standard wind ups but his HBA posts are a higher level but wont be troubling the top ten anytime soon. His 'How do you.......?' posts in the General topic section can still get a smile from discerning TT posters but overall, like his protege Shane, he might have to spend some time on loan at a gentler forum in order to hone his techniques if he's to progress to a Toontastic standard.

Looks like Brock is planning to take over the World as well, he's got the map on the wall so he's obviously got his strategic targets lined up.

Brock definitely wins the 'most likely to fit into 19th century' category. Good effort even if you cheated a bit.

Ask them if they fanciy a sucking you off while you finger their bumholes

"err, wha' La?"

There's well run clubs out there, there's also very rich owners as well as the dross, but for us it's only a 'mythical owner' that can change our club around and even if they did exist they'd tut tut at any fan unhappiness and look elsewhere instead.

Dream on, CT. Most non online fans may not want to join in any protests, however the bloke is still not liked and not trusted at best.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=19ZJA8rBkSM Best excuse ever for a resignation from a proper legend.

Open your windows and keep them open as long as possible while you're having this problem. Not the solution you want but it will help if you're patient enough to let them make their own way out. Expect very little help off the local authorities as you've probably already sussed out.

I didn't bother with the bread and milk.

Buy them that long life milk, they won't ask you again.

I'll be buying some bread and milk in the morning if that helps?