Howmanheyman

1-0 Preston.

I'm watching that at the minute. I'm enjoying it but think it's definitely been overhyped. Soprano's is in a different league imo which I'm watching again.

Does Parky have any theories on these two...... leannenufc (31 Fry (30) Both share the same birthday and both were last online on the same day. Were they taken out in a double hit? (I'm bored).

This place is a graveyard. RTG having new threads popping up all over the place atm. Gus out, kernts, fuck off mag etc, etc.

You don't really do comedy do you?

How the fuck was the Bradford game not shown on tv but villa v Leicester was?? Anyway, absolutely lolz at the mackems. :lol:

How do you know the medical staff didn't inform Charnley of his previous injury record? How do you know the club didn't take a risk as they hoped he would get a good injury free run, show his quality and then make the club a profit when a more ambitious club bought him?

Bump. Many happy returns to the Messiah and Andrew.

Watched the second half of their game last night. As Gary Birtles would say, 'dear me'.

The secret diary of Lee Ryder aged 44 and a half. 12/02/2015 Dearest Brenda, as I sit here in this Dusseldorf hut I wonder how you are doing back home which I miss very much......Lol, just joking diary, it isn't Neville Hope, it's just your friendly neighbourhood Trinity Mirror group regional sports journalist of year reporter, Lee Ryder checking in forra catch up. Had a bit of a weird couple of days lately with people not paying the respect they should, namely a two bob cook and a Palace dogsbody who tried to shield the abdicated King, one Alan Pardew once of the throne of Barrack Road, from the Knight Ryder. Firsts off, ah got access in the tunnel at Selhurst Park after Carvs lads had fought for a valiantly hard won point at a tough place to go where we won 3-2 and 3-0 in the last two meetings. Ah was waiting for Carvs when ah spotted Pards walking past, being a journalist you learn not to let opportunities like this pass up, the ordinary punter in the street might get starstruck in these situations and stammer or ask for an autograph but Ryder spots the chance to get an exclusive Pards interview for the first time since the King had left the building. Ah was nee messing about with the silver Fox, ah said, "Alan! Alan! Hi mate! Great to see you again! great game tonight, it's me! Lee Ryder! Can ah have a couple of words if you're not too busy, like? The Chronicle's readers would love to hear from you, mate." Pards took one look and said, "Sure, Lee, would Lahve to have a natter, my old san. I tell you what, see that Palace PR geezer over there, tell 'im the King sent you and tell 'im to take you to the Longstand conference room. I'll see you in there in abaht ten minutes." Fucking champion! Pardew not forgetting our special relationship and a fantastic example of keeping good contacts in this crazy business of ours. Anyways, ah'm in this pokey Longstand conference room forra about an hour and a half, fuck me ah thought, is Pards tekking the piss here, like? how long is his fucking post match team talk going to go on for? Here was me waiting on him in this Longstand conference room which was just a glorified boot room where the lazy Palace players had just dumped their boots, bibs and cones, when finally a Palace employee opens the door and is about to turn the light off when ah dives in, "How! What ya deeing, man?! Ah'm waiting for Pards! " The Palace kid said, "I dahn't know who you are, fella, but Mr Pardew left for home 45 minutes ago and you shouldn't really be in here, Geordie." So that was the score, eh? The PR guy was trying to save Pards a Ryder grilling and ushered the ex-King out of the way, very cute ah suppose, credit to the PR kid, protecting his boss. Some you win, some you lose. The next day as ah finished up me match report ah decided to head down to the Thomson house canteen for some scran. Ah notice a new cook in there so ah says to him, "Alreet mate? Ah'll have three sausage, one black pudding, some bacon, give iz the crispy looking ones, some fried bread and beans. Cheers, mate." The cook said back, "Jamie Oliver doesn't get called 'mate' so divvent call me 'mate' ok?" Fuck me! the cheeky bastard! Ah says back, "Ah call Jamie Oliver a soft cockney wanker, do ya want me to call you a 'wanker' instead?" We stare each other out a bit before the Ryder glare gets too much for the kid and he serves up me bait. Fucking hell man, the company have to stop taking on these YTS catering kids, it's not doing the kids any favours thinking they can be lippy to old sweat, ex-terrace, away day Toon Army foot soldiers like yours truly. Anyways, respect, diary. Ryder and out.

"Colo! Colo! Put the cards away, son. Gouffs! Turn the Frankie Vaughan off the DVD player, man! Ginger Jack! Stop putting that blob over your head and trying to blow it up! Time to go into deep professional mode now, lads..........Arr fuck! Who's sprayed shaving foam aaa'l ower me arse you pack of cunts?"

I've got all of girls alouds names tattooed around my hondacracka area and not one of the ungrateful bitches have give me a nosh yet. Bad crack in my opinion.

This quality player we bought on the cheap appears to be faulty. If only this were like sports direct where we could return him for a full refund with no hassle at all.

http://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/newcastle-improved-alan-pardews-exit-8604291? Jesus Christ on a bicycle, where to start? Five questions on his mind, not just any questions, 'Burning' ones. And here they are....... 1. Have Newcastle improved or declined since Pardew’s exit? 2. Is it time to unleash the players that Pardew didn’t see eye to eye with on Wednesday night? 3. Should Mehdi Abeid be handed a start in the engine room against Palace or should Carver stick with Anita and Colback? 4. Should John Carver axe Remy Cabella after bottle-gate :lol: in the dugout? 5. Which fans will be loudest at Selhurst Park? :lol: (Bit disappointed he never made any suggestions for what songs both sets of fans could be singing).

Can't blame Stevie for that, everyone else has 'shoulders like pigeons' by comparison.

Saw his interview on Sky on the saturday show. Outrageously toeing the party line about not giving a flying fuck about comings and goings, he didn't 'fank' Mike but he was at least as bad as Pardew in knowing his place. We really do have Pygmies in a lot of the positions of 'power' [sic] at the present time under this owner. He's doing his level best in his audition. I showed more ambition the last time I put the lottery on.

Funny, I thought Sissoko and Anita were shite.

Not exactly a newsflash but we need a new owner and a new direction. Why do we just plod on with the same shit? How the fuck is Williamson still at this club amd playing games? How are we in a similar sleepwalk to the end of the season again?

I am enjoying the little things, wasn't many today. Very, very frustrating when you're winning with the end in sight and you can't fucking pass to a fellow professional instead of continually giving away possession with little pressure on. They were there for the taking more than normal and we were mostly shit and spectacularly wasteful with the ball. I didn't enjoy that game whatsoever.

You enjoyed that?

Even krul humping ball up instead of keeping possession. Utter utter shit.