Howmanheyman

Enough already, Rolf Harris.

If you want a decent kip, don't let your daughter have a sleep over with five of her friends. Noisy little buggers, not sure they've slept at all.

I once had a take away Indians, put the bairns to bed and watched 'the guns of navarone' on new years eve. Was the best nye I'd had for ages.

But would you crawl through broken glass just to stick matchsticks in her shit?

Whitley Bay, earlier on this afternoon. She said she was called Brenda.

I saw most of it. The bloke in charge of the contest blatantly hates the chants but is too cowardly to not try getting into it.

Happy Birthday, mate! (You share the same birthday as my youngest daughter who's 10. While you're celebrating I'll be having the pleasure of a sleepover with five of her mates, plus the other three females who live here.) P.S. No Savile jokes, please.

:lol:

How do we know he lives in the Cayman Islands? It's well documented on Cayman island forums who lives there and the residents themselves make no mention of a scoobos? Do we just believe this scoobos? /makom

He lives in a one bedroom flat in Kenton above the shops. At least he's close to some take aways and has easy access to some cans.

Great news! Can we not do a bogof deal with Obertan?

The secret diary of Lee Ryder aged 44 and a half 12/06/2015 Well after the radio silence put on yours truly and the Thompson House scribblers in general, word came out that we'd get sloppy seconds on a Steve McClaren interview. Punters reading this might think, 'lee, what's the big deal?You're a fucking lyrical gangster of regional sports writing, you're getting the interview even if it's a day later than the rest?' Ah love me punters, me loyal readers, they're the people who got me where I am by reading my shit hot pure fucking gold dust toon stuff, but bless them, they don't understand the snub the Ronny Gill had to swallow by getting this interview after the rest. Anyways, after hearing about us getting invited up to Casa Saint Jimmys for a belated interview with Schteve from Margaret on the reception desk ah dusted meself down, got my dictaphone and notepad and pen and headed out of THHQ ready to catch up with Schteve where ah left off in the bogs. Ah left the building only to see Gibbo and Mark 'Duggy' Douglas chatting in the street. As ah got near them ah heard Gibbo say to Duggy, "Give me a ring when you're finished. Ah'll see you in the Bacchus after you interview McClaren, Mr Glenfiddich for me if yer buying!" Ah couldn't believe this shit again! Ah piped up, "Am ah fucking hearing things again, here, like?! Ah gets part one of a quick interview with Schteve despite not being invited, and your sending Duggy to do part two of a proper sitty doon interview? Last time we got the Charnley interview ya gave it to fucking Neil Cameron! Divvent give iz that 'But Lee, the fans want to hear your toon/retro/man of the people' shite again, it just doesn't wash, this time!" John replied, "Err, calm doon, kidda, calm doon! Last time ah thought it would do Cams the power of good to get out of your shadow! Same this time with Duggy! You're the main man, Lee! The top dog of the Thompson House sports stable! The two lads need to have a go themselves! Plus it wouldn't be fair on Steve to get the full Monty Ryder grilling in only his first week Would it?" Ah couldn't fucking believe this shit, like. Gibbo thought I was the top dog of the Thompson House stable? Wow. A real compliment from a Ronny Gill legend! Ah thought, ah well, let Duggy have the interview. Good experience for the kid. Ah then made a quick phone call to Steve Wraith asking him for a quick chat with Pav about THAT entertainers side, seeing that Wraith was somehow Pav's agent. After a very tense ten minute call between former Toon Army foot soldier Ryder and former bouncer and one time general acquaintance of the Krays, Wraith, we settled on a twenty note deal to get Pav's new number that the baldy cunt made Pav change his phone to. Ah got another great retro toon tale and poor Duggy had to decipher Scteve's nonsense interview as the daft ginger twat still thought he was half Dutch. Lol! Laters, diary!

Either that or one of the defenders in the wall was about to tell her the latest happenings in Eastenders and she turned away as she hadn't caught up on her planner yet and didn't want to know.

The sun shines and I always say 'Sacre Blurt' in a French accent when I see a hinney. Chez letting the team down if he doesn't do that on French soil itself.

Very good.

Both very good. For some insane reason I get the tune of Boney M's 'one way ticket' replacing the constant 'one way ticket' chants with 'sunshine fanny' chants instead.

I took part in the boycottspurs, (was already boycotting anyway but turned up to demonstrate).

No permanent damage done, Gem. She'll just have a bit of headache the next day and the room was spinning a bit when she went to sleep.

Let's just say I drove tanks and flew Vulcan bombers and leave it at that. People can read into that what they like.

I was protesting against the board when you were just a spunk bubble in your milkmans japs eye.

You'd be a casting agents wet dream if he was looking for 'come dine with me' contestants, CT.

FYP

Giving them way too much respect there, Fish. Mirror Group has obviously coughed up some cash and Sky is our main income generator. That's as far as it goes.

You got the KB back then but 'Troy' didn't?

Recognise Moody from clips of Oliver but that's it I'm afraid. Lee played a great part in just about everything even when hamming it up. Lived some life before becoming a thespian as well it seems. RIP both.