Howmanheyman

Expecting a retrospective penalty to Bournemouth because Tony Gayle reckons we're got away with it.

Expecting a west ham away, shiting ourselves 2nd 45 mins now, though. (As well as we've played).

They're down to ten, apparently? Squeeky bum time in the 2nd half if Boro put a bit of pressure on.

If he starts blowing he'll get pulled off, the filthy animal.

Keep this up and it's really going to take the gloss off a potential win in 'el trampico' for the worthless club.

Get the fuck in!!!! Great ball in by Dummett, he sniffed that was on and went for it. Great to see.

Playing well 1st half, could do with a second as they'll be better 2nd half and the temptation to sit back will be strong.

Get in!!! Tony Gayle? Gutted btw.

I was the Mag at work this week talking to a lad I didn't really know and discovered he was a Mackem. I had to explain his clubs debt as he thought £50m was a good price and somebody would buy them and Short would scrub his loan. The other external debt was a bit complex for him and he virtually put his fingers in his ears when I discussed it but he did say Di Canio should've been listened to and all this wouldn't have happened if Sam was there as he was sorting everything out. I've honestly yet to meet a fan of a club he's been at with anywhere near the regard he's held with at Sunderland. I pointed out that he leaves a massive metaphorical turd in bog and fucks off as it starts to block the drain but he wasn't convinced. The bloke shouldn't have had another job in England IMO after he was caught out in the sting never mind because of his short, expensive stays at clubs with the sole, short term aim to add to his 'staying up' trophies he values so highly. He's fucking magic at pulling in favours from his media mates and pulling the wool over the gullibles eyes.

I watched the first two episodes of mind hunter. That was enough, tbh. Just watched the first episode of collateral, looks promising.

Yep good point.

He might as well have told the labour lad, 'if I want you to do something, I'll chuck you a banana'.

A 'just for fun' thread on there..... Fair play tbh, if my club was staring into the abyss after losing a six pointer the very thing I'd be doing is reminiscing about my life since our last derby defeat.

Tbf, I think it's really sinking in now on RTG.

Oh dear.

Read somewhere that Pardew said players involved will never play for him again. (Apparently another six players have come forward to claim they were in the back seats and another said he was in the boot).

Think Rodwell won't fuck off and leave them in the shite. Canny kid, him. Good pro.

Aye. Honestly, the longer they left getting relegated, the longer they sacked managers in time for the derby, the longer they took with the Johnson fiasco, the more desperate they got, the longer they clung to the derby games, the longer they kept spending money they didn't have, the bigger the fall was always going to be. But, as they say in Eastern Europe, tough shitski.

I can't lie, I quite like Mick.

What's with this 'Team GB' bollocks? Actually, fuck it. If you can't beat em......go team Newcastle!

Not sure if this is already on here but it features 'its a goal!' plus Gazza teaching Mirandinha how to talk English.

The secret diary of Lee Ryder aged 44 and a half 16/02/2018 The Rise and Fall of the Ryder Empire. Alreet diary? Been a while like. Ah thought mebbeez it was time to knock the entries on the heed, after all, unlike me cutting NUFC analisi, anallysi, err, insights, nee cunt actually read me personal diary apart from me! Anyways, Despite being top dog of the NE media ah wiz getting the impression that some were starting to get a bit starstruck by some of the other, newer kids on the NUFC block. For instance, ah noticed there was a NE press forum thingy to aid the Newcastle foodbank and the cheeky cunts didn't invite yours truly but had a few Johnny come latelys like Caulkin, Edwards, Bird, Hope and even that sly cunt Douglas who said fuck ahl in the canteen aboot it the morning before he went on. They even had mackem split-arse Louise 'Whese keyes are theyse' Taylor before me! Divvent get mad, get even is what they ahl say and the boy Ryder was aboot to do both. Ah noticed things were quieting doon with the takeover which was obviously fucking horrendous news as it was a piece of piss to keep regujita, regerger, err, bringing up the same shite in different ways then gannin for a few swift ones in the Bacchus but ah'd also had a bit of gen from one of me invaluable contacts here at Thomson house, one Mr Eddie Eats and his bloater missus, 'She who must be fed'. He reckoned one of the waiters at the Koh-i-noor let on that a certain Michael James Wallace Ashley had been in on a thorsda neet and said he'd been in sometimes other nights. Fucking jackpot! That's what sets the Knight Ryder apart from the likes of Douglas, the quality of me shit hot contacts, and talking of hot and shit ah was ganna have to take one for the team Ryder and mebbees get a vindaloo to listen to the takeover craic and risk a bit of Gandhi's revenge to get ahead of the competition. Ah got home that neet, got some of me black football boot polish and smeared it ahl ower me face and hoyed a toowel rund me nappa. 'They'll never be able to tell' ah said to mesel as ah headed off for the famous Geordie/Indian restaurant. Ah got there just before opening time, went rund the back door and persuaded the head chef gadgie that ah was a new temp kitchen staff ordered by the owner and he fell for it despite giving iz some strange looks. Ah tried to wash a few dishes and serve the customers waiting for the Shirebrook supremo to walk in and would mutter 'Goodness gracious me, I am standing right here beside myself' now and again to throw everyone off me Geordie scent. Anyways, patience is a virtue in this game as ahl the auld journalist sweats like me good self will tell you and right enough after half an hour in walked the sports direct guru, the fat cockney bastard himself, Mr Mike Ashley with my former top contact, Lee 'Penfold' Charnley. Ah let Gupta gan ower and tek his order whilst ah stood behind him also with my pen and notepad oot pretending to copy the order but really writing doon ahl the NUFC takeover craic which ah just knew me loyal punters would lap the fuck up. Ashley took his mobile out and rang someone. "Oi! Bish! What you up to you old fackin' slag? Hahaha! Listen, put the fackin' cast of 'the only way is essex' on hold and tell Linda Lusardi you're busy washing your fackin' Y fronts! I want you to get back onto talksport and get them on fackin' message, fackin' capice?" Wow! So it was true! Mike really DID like football and was joining in some top soccer debate on the drivetime topic, 'Is Rafa a Spanish whinging cunt?' hosted by Adrian Durham and the fat Yorkshire ex-cricketer, Darren Gough. Ah was desperately writing ahl this doon when in walked the lads from the Seaton Sluice social club on a Leo Sayer! They walked in, pissed as cunts when one of them said to iz, "How! Gunga-Din! Eight pints and eight chicken phals, bonny lad!" Fuck! It was Mala of the not so much 20/20 vision! Ah mumbled something like "Bud, bud, ding ding, certainly wor kid" but ah knew ah was sussed the moment ah said it. "Lee! What the fuck yi deeing you daft cunt?" Shit! Ah had to get oot of there sharpish with my dynamite NUFC info. The head waiter said "I knew you were taking the piss you fucking arsehole!" and chased iz oot through the kitchen and into the back alley and ah spilt a bowl of balti ahl ower me new LeShark jumper. The waiter had iz cornered and fancied his chances but he obviously had nee idea who he was up against. Fucking West Ham, Millwall, Leeds, Man U the lot, nen of them had been able to break the escort to get the better of the Toon army foot soldier Ryder and this cunt wasn't going to either. Ah was aboot to swing a punch but then ah clocked the kids trainers, fucking Lonsdale! The kid was obviously desperate with nowt to lose and ah knew ah didn't have time to do the dance with the lad so ah flicked a bit of balti off me shirt into his eye and pushed past him to get the Metro home and write up tomorrows Ronny Gill back page which would not only satisfy me loyal punters, not only get one over on Caulkin and co, but would mean ah could knock off sharp and have a pint with the lads in the club and fill them in with me never ending Toon exploits! Anyways, things to do, awards to win! Lol! Laters. Ryder and out!

Glad Jonas is looking well and enjoying life.

I thought you were older than that tbh.

No idea what this film's about, haven't seen any trailers or anything but if anything would make me consider giving it a chance this post probably would.