Howmanheyman

'Hi 606, Newcastle fan, I'm a season ticket holder.' (Me in the car) 'What hand do you hold it with you fucking knob.'

Hated football till Italia 90 and/or sky took over and couldn't tell you any match anecdotes from before then and didn't know many players pre-1992 types.

Bloke in the local shop spelled it 'Whissy'. Also sold 'Lambruso'.

More 'takeovers' than cup wins under Ashley.

Don't diss.... 'Woah! Johnny, Johnny! Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny Anderson!' Sit on the naughty step for three minutes then you can come back and say sorry.

I researched it.

It's now like Everton trying to take the piss out of Liverpool.

Some of the most plastic NUFC fans I've ever met have had season tickets. (Anyway, I was only having a carry on with you, mate).

Here's my own question. What the fuck have you got against fans who don't have a season ticket? Fuck your survey and fuck you!

Knight Ryder: "Welcome to the Toon, home of Newcastle United, Valentino. My first burning question to you is this.....(tries to keep grin in).....Have you ever.....(looks around room, smug look on his face, then looks back at new signing)..... have you ever seen a mackem in Milan?"

Absolutely.

Ryder'd Your Post.

That was someone else, Renton just pissed all over the house and on here when Sammy Seagull and his family moved into his chimney.

I was just about to go online and check Milano airport's departures but once again, Lee Ryder is taking care of business for his loyal punters. Cheers, Lee!

Was he not in the studio when we beat them 5-0 looking sick as fuck saying Peacock's header wasn't over? I'm sure he was an ex-Man U player by then?

If you can't find some decent scran in Newcastle city centre to wash down your drink with then you'll be walking around blindfolded! Don't waste precious piss time queuing for overpriced drink and scolding, tasteless food in the stadium, man! You'll need the halftime break to queue to empty your bladders.

Made from Guddaz.

This years PL is absolute fucking gash. Man U are fifth after being beaten at home to Burnley and are on just 34 points. We're 14th and just four points behind them and have only one goal between our actual centre forwards. It's almost February.

Who?

I think this needs more investigation. I may be some time. Don't wait up.