Howmanheyman

I said I'd be out but can't really be arsed now. Still haven't caught up with my sleep from coming off Nightshift a couple of days ago because daughters.

He's still on there and well. Also keeping an eye on cheeky cunts on here who bring him up from time to time in a less than flattering manner. I told him to get back on but he won't.

Alreet Yoda, settle down.

Please don't thank me, I literally didn't mean a word of it.

Well I have to say you're made your point quite eloquently by your standard......

Next time I need some help with something I'm going to have a wank in front of Penelope Cruz. I'm sure she'll understand?

Also nice to see Gallagher not forgetting the SAFC/Man City friendship* now that they're a million miles away from each other. *One of the many football alliances Sunderland have with other clubs. (No way he'd ever consider a Mag for a bouncer. FTM!)

M to the L to motherfucking F. Everywhere!

I'll put my thinking cap on, marra. See what I can do.

"I'd be more suited to a Real Madras."

Knew you'd reply. Minder? Professionals? Shite. Zulu's still worth a watch once in a blue moon. Just don't fancy a lot of what's on Netflix although it's true I don't give much a chance. Too busy to watch shite.

Can I just go against the grain and say it's waaaaay overhyped. You're welcome.

Happy birthday you auld letch!

Knight Ryder: "a Burnley fan had the audacity to say 'how do you watch that every week?' Ah couldn't believe what ah was hearing, here, like. Ah gans up to him, gives him the Ryder glare ah gave to them lippy cunts outside McDonald's who were asking iz forra 'tab mister' and telt im straight. 'Are yee for real, like?' his face went a bit funny and he walked off canny sharpish. Lol. You don't mess with the Knight. Laters." Twenty minutes later..... Burnley fan: "A wuh joking on with a couple of Geor-dayz about how crap the game, ah say, how crap the game was and one of them, a bald lad, said something ah just couldn't understand. Mind, ah understood he must've had a right good drink the night before and had a kebab of something cos his breath almost made me sick on the spot. Ah couldn't get away quick enough, ah tell ya."

Macron. (Just for @Howay).

Turtle shit from both sides.

Could see them scoring from a dead ball. Ref didn't want to know about the free kick to us for Willems or leading to the corner. Shite.

Carroll should've scored.

Ronny Gill headline writer: "I need a shite. Lee, will you sort the puma headline for me?" Knight Ryder: "Nee bother, wor kid. I can see the headline now, 'Newcastle 2020-21 jerseys to be not made by puma!' Up here for thinking, doon there for dancing."

1. Looks like we're getting someone other than puma next year to make our shirts. 2. Wonder who's going to do it next? 3. The Ronny Gill headline.

I heard the 9.45 from Rome to Turin was always late. Notorious for it.

It was indeed staggering. Almost as staggering as shouting 'No surrender to IRA!' at Ingurland games and being so determined to not surrender to them that they inevitably said fuck Northern Ireland when the complexities of Brexit and the good Friday agreement came up. Almost as if they didn't have a clue/give a fuck about the IRA/keeping Ulster British after all?