Howmanheyman

I'm as anxious as anyone for the new deals but we already have sponsorship so I'd have thought they'll come in the summer?

"....and I said to my wife, for serie a, we must go to Don Ciaoman." "What do you want me to do?" [Whispers inaudibly] "That I cannot do. If you had've come to me as a friend and asked me if he was any good then the information you want would yours this very day, but let's be frank, you didn't want my friendship, even though we all look at PLs GIFs drinking coffee. You came on this message board and you had a good time skiving at work and you didn't need a man like me, you went to your stat hipsters instead, but now you say, 'Don Ciaoman, give me his xG stats.' You don't show any respect." "Be my friend........ Godfather." "Very well. Ok, he's a canny player, I'd definitely have him in the side. For now, accept this serie a crack as a present on the day of my first day off till Tuesday."

Not one of the cunts has ever struck a bat in their lives apart from being absolute weirdos.

An oregano, a rosemary and a basil tried to get served late on but the barman said, 'sorry, thyme at the bar, please. Thyme at the bar'

I tried licking Roger Tames arse but nookie bear kept getting in my way whilst Roger was shouting every cliche known to man into a microphone, it would've been hard for me to do but meat and drink for Roger.

I first tried licking Doug Weatherall's arse but I couldn't see my way as the shadow was too big.

I, along with my mates, affectionately nicknamed Benny Kristensen the Mad Chef after the character from the Muppet show but we weren't in a bromance with the local sports media so got no credit whatsoever, if only we'd licked John Gibson or Alan Oliver's arse? Sad. 😟

After handing the tickets out.... Said something very similar earlier on to someone. 🤞

Short term, just a bit of consultation work it looks like?

Just in the bait room crying at this, luckily nobody else was in at the time.

I fancy us to give them a game and hopefully get some revenge on them however this is with the caveat of having a level playing field when it comes to the officials and the VAR horrors watching it in the background.

You can't knock the absolute loyalty the athletic show to their mates for fan quotes, err, I mean Eddie shows to Tindall and the players.

Be a copper standing on the west gallowgate/west stand paddocks turnstiles I'd have thought?

King of the GIFs strikes again.....

My lass edges me by walking near the kitchen door but not actually going into the kitchen.

Harsh. 'Release Roderick' would've done with maybe 'He's a robber' added if he managed the first bit.

I thought it was code for 'I will do virtually anything to keep people's attention'.

That's great but what happened when you dropped the acid?

None for me, on a course at work, no internet in the house, bairn wouldn't have realised either.

Eranu! The correct answer is Sam Allardyce.

+1 How do you pronounce it? S-nus? S.N.U.S? Snooos? (I'm now more bothered about the pronunciation than whatever the fuck snus actually is).

Because there's no real skin in the game or hatred then you usually smile seeing fans at international tournaments, probably only really the Russians or the England fans where you wouldn't have strictly benign thoughts. (Unless of course the cameraman focuses in on a hinny).

Never mind jellyhead yanks reaction videos, get them on to remote villagers reaction videos if that's their thing.

Not just well said but concise as well.