Howmanheyman

Aye, TBF, it's paying for the mortgage so I'm not COMPLETELY digging into my bit from work but it's all I'm getting because of my.... Oh yeah.... my bit from work.

He's good at moody staring at a camera in an alleyway for a black and white photo.

I received a letter on my acceptance, they seem pretty keen to 'sanction' people. Do this, don't do that, if you do we'll sanction you £12 a day for X amount of months which is basically all your dole money. I don't know how to break it to them but that £86 isn't an incentive to sit on my arse for the rest of my life as it's just a soupçon under what we need to live on.

I'm getting a massive £86 a week. I haven't even spent last week's yet. I'm sure they won't mind me investing it in bitcoin especially when I tell them it's advice from CT on the internet.

I'll put my job seekers allowance on it, CT. This time next week I'll be a millionaire.

I very rarely put on Sky sports news and usually turn it over pretty quick when I do. Yesterday I put it on and one of the presenters was joined by two blokes, no idea who they were but I kept it on for a minute as they had Eddie, Trips and Almiron pictured in the background. This is what I caught some of.... Unknown bloke 1 was going on about how Bayern always win the league, Barcelona and Real Madrid usually win it in Spain but apart from Man City lately, more teams win it here SO WHY SHOULD NEWCASTLE BE ALLOWED TO JUST BUY WHO THEY WANT so in a nutshell the regs were good. Also said we'll be ok as joelinton is nearly back from injury. That's when I turned it off. No idea who the fuck they were but at least educate yourself on the situation without making a tit of yourself regarding big Joe and we can't invest to grow the club as dipshit reckons it isn't fair. They know the square root of fuck all. (Can't remember if I mentioned it yesterday as my brain is turning into mush).

It's the company he keeps iyam.

"Penfoooooolddd!!!!" "Yes?" "Is this fucking you?!"

I like a lot of the Eurythmics stuff but when I discovered Dave Stewart was a mackem I said to myself, 'I dinnot care that you and Annie are pleasing on me ear, ahve not listened to car salesmens bullshit to put up with Yee so dinnot tell me about any thorns in ya side, am not fucking interested now, marra.'

Paddy moves to England and starts frequenting his new local every Friday where he always buys three pints and when taking a drink takes turns with them. The barman asked him why he didn't just buy a pint at a time? Paddy tells him "Back home me and my two brothers would have few hours in our local every Friday without fail. When I drink they way I do it's like they're here with me." So this is what happens all year until one night he comes in and only orders two. The barman looks at another regular and they fear the worst. The barman goes over to paddy and gently says, "Paddy, I'm guessing you must've lost one of your brothers, I don't want to interfere with your grief but I'll just say I'm sorry for your loss." Paddy looks up puzzled and says "What? My brothers are perfectly fine." The barman then asks why he's only got two pints tonight? Paddy smiles and says, "I've only got two pints because I'm doing dry January and I know they won't do it."

His first name will do or just his surname. We'll do the rest.

The Wraith part of this post.... I'd forgotten all about that.

I think we were already 2-0 up when he scored, game was already decided, nothing to play for and they were getting relegated because of it. He looked like a FA cup finalist from the seventies or eighties scoring the winning goal.

The pressure is now on all on the rest of you to give him a good nickname. Last, most recent one I recall being created was for a lad who got caught pinching someone's bait, (roast chicken) from the fridge at work. His new nickname became 'KF-Lee'.

I'm sick as fuck at the minute but then I realise I'm not exile so it's not all bad.

Faaar more impressed with you meeting Sarah Cracknell if that was you?

Alright, Troops?

MFdYP

Even though I wasn't tagged I'll tell you. Zero, nada, zilch zip.

Is it not a wind up?

Sadness in their eyes, brains, hearts and all the rest of them tbh.

FTMdYP

Gaius Julius Caesar has let himself go a bit, one minute you're coming, seeing and conquering, next you're dealing with car salesman and writing in gibberish whilst criticising your new manager.... Just dinnot get me started on this marra.

Some ITK postman has apparently uploaded a postcard already from Tripps to their lass so he's obviously already been over for a recce trip.