Howmanheyman

Unless she's a practicing her Italian accent?

I once had a dirt cheap subscription for the athletic for basically nothing for the first few months. I cancelled way before I needed to. It was pretty poor I thought, and some of the stuff I've seen in the last couple of years it looks like it's only gotten worse.

Looks like she's floundering on her sentences.

I'm starting my new job on Wednesday and I'm feeling strangely down about it. I'm not even sure it's nerves that much? I'm fixating a bit on the permanent Sundays but I don't know. Maybe I've become too used to being off and the missus condition is just getting worse mobility wise. Am I just being lazy?

I know. Wasn't sure if he was talking a stain or former NUFC and Everton (?) player Sylvain Distin instead?

No you're wrong, the polls haven't had time to catch up yet.....

Oh, oh. Someone's going to be in trouble.

'ah was walking down Madison, (ah swear ah never had a gun) and ah saw a ninetayn ninetey Marco lads shirt. I shouted over 'Gerrin! FTM!' and the new yorka turned around and said, 'hey man, I hate the mags toooo but I loved the Netflix Sunderland till I die show, I watched all the seasons and bought this shirt on eBay, buddy." Then a cop on a horse who overheard clapped and give us a backa on his horse back to my hotel like Crocodile Dundee and we passed maceys and al that and a cafe where a lush lass was fayaking an orgasm or she'd seen my lads top, hard to tell, marra.'

Hook, line and sinker.

"He turned and looked but said nothing." These mags always saying fuck all when pulled, looking embarrassed or looking down at their feet The story's may get tweaked but the patter remains the same.

Lady à Courcey DeTroyte: "Darling, I need a word. I've found out about your dirty little secret." Lord à Courcey DeTroyte: "Ah, listen darling I can explain, I tripped over a kerb and ended up landing on the male prostitute who just happened to be lying there naked sniffing cocaine. In the fall my clothes snagged on a protruding erection causing them to fall off and his rolled up fifty pound note ended up one of my nostrils with the class A drug accidently being inhaled from a line spread out on his buttocks." Lady à Courcey-DeTroyte: "No, not that, the fact you're standing in this year's election for Sunak!" Lord à Courcey DeTroyte: "Oh fuck. You know."

Has Eales appointed his replacement?

Even Johnny Deka has knocked it back.

Just had a quick look online and it appears as yet my constituency doesn't even have a Tory candidate!

The Glover family. Il Capo di tutti capi:

Harry Kane watching this get announced.....

He thinks he would've been a fashion designer if he wasn't a footballer.

Beppe from EastEnders: "No president has ever been attacked as much." JFK's brain: "Hold my beer."

What happens? A fine but basically a slap on the wrist? Does it go to appeal? I'm sick of hearing about how he's fucked this time but is still on the scene.

Obviously I'm pleased for you or sorry it happened, Alex.

Or we're just a bit brighter than them? Comme ci comme ça.

It's real. Just not to the scale their paranoia suggests. Ah well. Nevermind.

There'll be some decent England fans no doubt but the cunts who follow them have zero in common with me. I see them as being from a different nation and history tells you I'm not far wrong. I'm not taking any questions on this.