Howmanheyman

🎵 He's got.....hiiiiigh hopes, He's got.....hiiiiigh hopes, He's got high, apple pie in the..... Sky hopes.... 🎶

I'm convinced if sky televised tiddlywinks, put it on somewhere called St. Mark's Park and nicknamed it the 'Marky Parky' and had Laura Wood hosting it, half the cunts in this country would watch it and talk about it.

"Do the thing at the end of the game, marra!"

Kyril looked at the North Stand, looked at the derby highlights on his phone, then looked back to the North stand...... "Hello? Is that the cabal of mysterious Tyneside businessmen? It's a single mysterious Swiss-French Wearside based businessman here. If you need any extra seats for all those members who can't get into SJP I have an entire stand you can use. You can have all the seats, £15 a pop, £10 if you have to uninstall them yourself or for £12.50 I can arrange for our fans to do it for you with their own tools? If this doesn't suit you then we can install some iPads to the back of the North Stand seats showing Newcastle games and I'll change the black cat's bar back to black and white again? Nexus are in your pocket like so many nickels and dimes so will put on some extra trains and busses if you request it?"

Al part of the model, marra.

The difference in reporting from the BBC very early on when it broke in Italy compared to when it got here was night and day. The reports coming from there was comparable to some apocalyptic film but changed drastically when it hit good ol' blighty.

I used to work with a fucking gorilla who actually worked in the mine where their ground is now. He just caught the end of it as a young lad. Broad mackem accent, built like a brick shit house, great lad...... Aye, there was something else , he was a Mag.

Said it before but.... Swap Tory government for royal family in this case but, aye, similar vibes.

That'll be all over the news I'm sure. For days.

Mental. Yet their pity for other, less fortunate people is somewhat different.

Show some respect like our beloved daily mail..... 🙏

No, he's just taking the piss out of them.

Was ist das? I sincerely hope this business isn't run by any MLFs? I also hope MLFs don't see this and boycott their business or leave shitty reviews like they did by wrongly targeting a sign business for the derby carry on?

"Imagine if Hendo had of signed for Feyenoord instead? Ah'd be saying, 'Gerrin, Jordan lad!' That'll piss off the Mags because lots of raysuns. Might have a treble link now betwayn Ajax, feyenoord and the lads, am shewa feyenoord lads winna mind Ajax joining in one of owwa many, many speshul relayashinships? FTM, son." "FTM, Dad."

London. Say no more.

Something, something, toot and come in.

That's still a good one, even from when Denisovan man was telling it.

"I'm afraid you've just fallen short of your annual targets, err, HMHM.... and as such, I'm terribly sorry to have to say there'll be no birthday or Christmas card from Mrs Dickson or myself this year."

Errrr, I think I'll just pass despite it having a competitive minimum wage, on-site parking and only statutory holiday entitlement, (probably statutory sickness too) but it was a tough decision knowing I'll be giving up a chance to get a birthday and Christmas card from the Dickson family. Didn't even notice the amazing X1 death in service or the 3% pension. They've got a fucking cheek charging the prices they do is all I'm saying.

Fucking sycophantic toad.

"..... And furthermore, not only will a cup run incur additional costs for hosting games but travel expenses could be prohibitive. This plus the almost certainty of relegation should you have a cup run means I'd warn against putting anything other than a third string out...... What?....... You're sacking me? But this advice I'm giving you was literally beat into me by my leader, Mike, profit be upon him."

Do you need to borrow something, Dave?