Howmanheyman

They're tasty, tasty, very very tasty, they're very tasty. Special K?

Class, mate.

Just stumbled across these photos. Excellent. I was at all but the Charlton and Southampton one, I'm sure Gary Kelly saved two pens versus Chelsea in the 3-1 win.

Water Margin? Excellent.

Dallas was actually canny good. Pure cheese but hilarious with it. Larry Hagman man I quite admired Victoria Principal, JR was a proper Texan twat, Cliff Barnes did nothing apart from slag JR off and order Chinese take-aways with his lass. you mean don't you? Well, I'll stick with 'admired' for now.

Dallas was actually canny good. Pure cheese but hilarious with it. Larry Hagman man I quite admired Victoria Principal, JR was a proper Texan twat, Cliff Barnes did nothing apart from slag JR off and order Chinese take-aways with his lass. Don't forget the poisoned Dwarf! She was alright, actually, never seen the attraction of Sue-Ellen the piss-head.

You couldn't help but sing along to dogtanian, mind.

Dallas was actually canny good. Pure cheese but hilarious with it. Larry Hagman man I quite admired Victoria Principal, JR was a proper Texan twat, Cliff Barnes did nothing apart from slag JR off and order Chinese take-aways with his lass.

I'm surprised nobody's mentioned Dynasty.

Best theme tune for a kids programme ever. Gentlemen, I give you... Close, very close but space age Greek mythology just pips the splits and their Arabian Knights.

Off the top of my head; Auf Wiedersehen Pet 1&2 Boys from the black stuff Das boot (the series, not the film) Life on Mars Morse The Fast Show (I've probably missed ones I liked more, but there you go, I have to say me and the missus like 'Lie to me' at the minute with Tim Roth.) The singing detective was very good too.

Best theme tune for a kids programme ever. That's an audacious claim. Gummi bears? Banana Man? Fraggle Rock? Danger Mouse? Not even close. (haven't a clue what the gummi bears goes like, tbf).

Best theme tune for a kids programme ever.

It mightn't be funny but this was the real deal when I was young'un. Or;

Totally agree. I reckon from the age of 5 to 14, 95% of my living thoughts were about football. Even worse though are blokes who just don't like football, I haven't got one male mate who is a football hater, I don't think I could have neither. How can you have a mate who doesn't like football? Makes you wonder whether football will enter a supporters decline in the next ten years or so as kids nowadays dont play it like we used to. Days for us used to be a lickabout in the playground, twice a day. Run home, get changed and straight onto the field for two hours. Finishing off after tea with an hour or so of head tennis in the street. School holidays just meant two 4 hour long games followed by tea and twice as much head tennis. Nowadays you dont see kids knocking a ball around in the street. In the summer holidays this no word of a lie, we used to play football, at least 8 hours a day, 7 days a week, I bet people think am kiddin. 3 pots in, heads and volleys, world cup singles, beat the keeper, magic, magic days, some kids still have them but it's not the same, they all have play stations and are spoilt little cunts. I had a computer but it was secondary to playing football. You could guarantee on any given day we could get 10-30 kids for a game, within a 3 to 4 age radius of me. Today there are few kids playing and it's heart breaking. The likes of Steven Gerrard, Rio and Lampard are my generation in 10 years time, if you think the conveyor belt of young talent is shite now, I think due to the fact we've become a nation of fat lazy kids, we'll be lucky to produce world class stars. Kids looked better cos we were all fit as fuck, you're only talking 20 years ago here. Spoilt cunts the lot of em. All I ever wanted was me BMX, match and shoot once a week, and enough for 10 packets of stickers. Sad how lifes went down hill since then in the name of progress. My first proper memory of mass football games was the Espana '82 world cup, we'd play football in the 'rec' behind our street, I'd be either Zico, (not Mick Martin!) or Socrates because the Brazilian names sounded cool as fuck to a young kid, we'd play all day until either the glue sniffers came to hang about or our mams called us in for our tea or there was a game on the telly, after the world cup a certain KK joined us and every kid would shout 'KEEGAN!' as they had a shot. As an aside, I found an old photo of my school team collecting our medals for winning our league in 1984, there was a few toon shirts, some black & white, some silver, I had an admiral England shirt on, (the last England top I've ever had) and there wasn't one Man U/LFC whatever shirt to be seen. I find it a bit fucking sad when I see a Chelsea top or whatever on any kids around Newcastle, and the amount of blokes who wear them, what sad, sad bastards are these?

Have a good time, Percy.

Every jock I've ever spoken to has pronounced definitely, the way you have spelt it there. The scoreline, while being meaningless in terms of competition, is a black stain on our history, when you consider that half the players out there were bought for individual fees worth more than the value of Leyton Orient. Jings! Ah didnae ken!

That scoreline is fucking disgraceful especially considering the line up and the fact they've already had a few run outs this pre-season, although Ashley is ultimately responsible for all this shit, you can definately point fingers at the players for this result, where the fuck is their pride in themselves, never mind the club/shirt? (I know they couldn't really care about the shirt/club). Whats their excuse this time? "Well, as ze Orient player was just about to try and go past me, I couldn't 'elp but think on how ze future is going to be for me and zis great club, next thing I know, he is past me and they score, ze uncertainty of the club is to blame, ze future is not something I find interesting and special, that is why we lost". Cowards and con-men.

Things that piss me off; Southern wankers who ring these phone-ins about Newcastle Utd and tell us they're sick of talking about NUFC and we're not a big club, (actually, this bit makes me laugh, its the bit they usually add that pisses me off), "They only used to get 8,000 when they were in the Championship". Apart from the fact that we've never been in the fucking 'championship', they spout the same shit they heard from any other phone-in mug who can't (and isn't!) asked to back up his claims with any facts to prove his bollocks. I do find it funny that 95% of people who talk about NUFC on these shows aren't Mags. I've got a contract mobile phone, I never use all my talk time, whenever I have to deal with anything like utility companies or just about anything, the numbers they give you are 0845 or whatever, your talk time isn't included for these, every fucking company seems to do it, what's the fucking point of having loads of minutes when these twats (who are all in it together) are creaming as much as they can get from normal mugs like me! Cunts! Pizza menus, lidl brochures and countless other shit that gets put through my door, and thats not including junk mail. FUCK OFF!!! I don't want your shit and I'm sick of it lying on my hallway everytime I come in. I've got to go, I may come back to this later.

The trouble is, if you say nowt, some of them think that they are proven right by your silence.

Again how can I possibly comment on a season that was 20 years ago, I was 4. I don't know the reason why the gates were so low then, it doesnt make sense to me as i've got several videos from that mid eighties era with Villa, Ardilles, Hoddle, Waddle and we were fantastic. I would hazard that the economic situation had some to do with it, Thatcher era... I do take issue with those saying I'm not renewing because its a farce and manager isn't installed and Ashley is in charge BUT preach about how fan fucking tastic it is you have 25,000 true supporters that have signed up for this season. Don't take credit for it, it aint you thats sticking by the club no matter what. Fair weather fans. Fairweather fan, eh? I can't speak for anyone else on here but I'm not renewing because I'm out of work and I won't give Ashley a cash injection when he won't buy or sell anyone and is looking to bail out. I don't want him taking my money as a leaving present, thanks. I'll still be going to games, money permitting, (I have a wife and two daughters,) so I'll still do my bit, just like I did my bit in the division 2 days, in fact, I'm probably the opposite to a fair weather fan as I was left outside when times were good at SJP, so to be labelled fair weather does make me laugh a bit. I don't know what it is about London, but you really do have a higher percentage of bulls knackers who talk shite as easy as the rest of us breathe.

Put it up for sale at £100M, if someone buys, great, if they don't, well, unfortunately we'll just have to plod on, shame we didn't have time to appoint a manager, buy and sell players, you know, the stuff normal clubs do, oh well, at least we saved some cash and being put on the spot from A Shearer.

Look at the name on the top left of the post, that'll help you to tell the difference. Other than that, you'll have to ask Stevie.

No, Stevie appears to have taking a shining to my sig and has 'borrowed' it. Your welcome, Stevie. (Then again, I've rifled the funny pics thread on the other general forum so I can talk.)

I can't see the link our Spurs friend has put on, which is a shame. Perhaps he can explain how a Spurs side who finished 3rd in the league in 1989-90 could only pull in an average, (not one-off), gate of 26,463? Although to be fair, that is still a bit better than the average gate of 25,881 that they got in 1986-87 for finishing third again.