Howmanheyman

The word that's coming to mind reading that is Meltdown.

Nee idea, Esteban. I thought the Brucey Lesbian look-a-like was going to try and set about me one night because I apparently snubbed my then girlfriend and the mouthy fucka, The Lezza/Bruce, not my lass, wasn't happy about it. It was the night we drew 1-1 with Forest when Woan scored and that was basically game over for the title. I've never hit a lass before but this abomination came mighty close had her chins got any more closer to my face. Horrible woman.

Not unless he could put on a good Lancs accent, but the hairstyle, the grin, the chin(s), its all there.

He's the double of this Lesbian who used to get in my old local, he really is.

Asked the wife for some oral relief last night, she said, "Do you expect me to suck you off this second? You can forget it!", I said, "No, I just want you to shut the fuck up".

Bad craic that HMHM. I can relate to it massively - particularly the bit about the kids holding those candles. I've been apart from my ex for almost 5 years now, divorced for almost 2 and in a little over 2 weeks i'll finally stop living with my kids. Not looking forward to it at all. Chin up fella and concentrate on the good stuff. Make sure the time you have with the kids is rich with fun and enjoyment and they'll come round to the idea that it's all for the best. Hope you feel better about it soon. Cheers, mate. If it wasn't for the kids I could cope no bother. They constantly drop hints about mammy and daddy getting married again and stuff like that. I wish it could work just for their sakes but it can't and I feel really, really guilty for that

It wouldn't fit you!!

Your life will never be the same. In a good way.

Am trying to save up to get my own place after my 16 years with the same person has finally came to an end. Feel shit as my daughters are young and are still holding candles that mammy and daddy will get back together.

I'm shocked. He looks older than 33.

Ask Detective Inspector Steven of the West Denton Police Wrong'un Task Force.

Speak for yourself, I'm 25. Aye, and I'm 26 Paul Wynn reckons you're only as old as the victim you're feeling.

Speak for yourself, I'm 25.

Was expecting a bit of stick, not least for the double use of 'it' in the thread title, but opinion doesn't seem divided. I actually walked into TopMan and the jeans etc, fuck me, lets just say I wont be going back anytime soon. What's the word? Metrosexual? Don't know if it's an age thing but if peer approval meant looking like an err.....lets say 'cupid stunt' seeing TR's about, then I'd risk ostracism, personally.

.......Or is the dress sense of teenagers/early twenties fucking horrendous and very, very camp looking? I was out and about yesterday and popped over the Metrocentre for something and the groups of lads I saw, (who goes shopping with their mates for fucks sake??!!) looked a right fucking clip. Them stupid fucking jeans that look as if you have a few heavy wrenches hanging in your back pocket a la MC Hammer circa 1990 and the slipper type shoes with no socks on and the daft hair cuts, it's just so Wham-tastic, I keep expecting Pepsi and Shirley to turn up. Get a fucking grip, young'uns. Any Geordie young'uns reading this then give your fucking heeds a shake, you big Jessies!

Will it end up like a reverse situation of the stoning in 'The life of Brian' where the blokes dress up to get in? Would you dress up as a lass to get in a Tyne & Wear derby if it happened here? There seems to be a few dodgy characters about here these days, would you dress as a woman, derby or no derby?

Players come and go as do managers, some will live in the memory and be cherished, others will fade into obscurity where they belong. Ashley will just hopefully end up a mysterious shit stain that appeared on your Y fronts as a kid where you had no idea how it got there and were embarrassed it was there until it went. But the club? Ingrained into my soul forever, the games from the past, real and proper 'I was there' moments, Forest and the pitch invasion for older Mags, Pompey and David Kelly for others and many more, too many to mention. Trips away with a support whose humour, patter and full on support were second to none. Memories never to be forgotten. NUFC represents a City with an identity that few other city's can get near in my humble opinion. This club of ours should represent that and it has. Ashley is Gnats cock by comparison.

Do you do Bar Mitzvahs, Andy? My sarcasm detector is working again I'm afraid I'm being serious!!! Haha ok sorry mate i thought it was just the usual "weddings/bar mitzvahs" joke lol I haven't done one tbh but I don't see why not... Can u PM me the details? Its nothing concrete yet, it's for my mate. He's not actually Jewish but is a real tight fisted wanker. (Took you fucking long enough to bite!!!)

Same here. Don't find it as easy to casually bar-/restaurant-hop like you might over here, for example (or elsewhere in the States, for that matter - Nashville was brilliant for that). But it might be a question of knowing the right areas - you can easily have a massively shit time in London if you don't know where to go, say. That must be where I come in. The times I've been there I've never seen what the fuss is about and in actual fact I can't stand the place.

Its going to happen, Rob!

To be fair to him he also said the police were entirely responsible for the deaths at Hillsborough for failing to close the tunnel through to the centre pens before opening the gate. They were only interested (and listened) to the 'scrapping terraces' bit, mate. Aye, they were... but he wasn't. Dunno if you've read the reports he did but all seater stadia was only one of many recommendations that he made. They carefully ignored the rest. Used to come watch the matches as SJP as well, did he not? Well my retired librarian aunt knew him, don't know if he went to the games. He also said it shouldn't be used as an excuse to raise the prices when the converted stands from terraces came into effect. Yeah right!

To be fair to him he also said the police were entirely responsible for the deaths at Hillsborough for failing to close the tunnel through to the centre pens before opening the gate. They were only interested (and listened) to the 'scrapping terraces' bit, mate.

Talking of honours, Justice Taylor recommended all seater stadia to parliament to which they passed a law making it so and Taylor very soon afterwards becomes Lord Taylor of Gosforth.

Do you do Bar Mitzvahs, Andy? My sarcasm detector is working again I'm afraid I'm being serious!!!

Nailed on to beat them in my opinion. Stoke away to you after a hard game in Kiev? Plus you lot under pressure for a win? It was a home banker all day.